[Network Audio] (October 12th)

[work_wife]

[OOC: As this Network post will absolutely contain spoilers for Stranger Things canon in the threads, I have left the TL specifically vague. Assume any and all threads here have spoilers for Stranger Things]


You know, from all I heard of these storms, wasn't expecting this sorta-phone to pop back on. Anyway, uh, it's Robin. I have good news and I have bad news for you.

Good news? I recognize why the storm looks like this. And what the noises are.

Bad news? I recognize why the storm looks like this. And what the noises are.

Tips for survival are as follows. They're afraid of fire and it hurts them a LOT. Keep your back to things because you can't trust them not to come up behind you. DO NOT BLEED. Try to hide together in groups. And if you can fight, well, guess we need to brief you on what's going on. So check the fuck in because this is a Code Red.

Comments

[Audio]

[tyrants_son]

[Years of paranoia have had him keeping his back to walls and appropriate cover, and bleeding certainly won't be a problem from him. Fire... Well. Normally that wouldn't be a problem either, but then again...]

Speak. What are these creatures and their significance?

[work_wife]

[There's definitely the sound of stuff being packed in a hurry as she talks.]

Well they're demobeasties and they want to eat us. Because, you know, predators or something. Some fly, demobats. About the size of a large house cat. Three tails and tons of teeth in their five petaled mouths. No eyes. They can smell blood. Maybe sense heat too since they hate it. There's also demodogs and demogorgons. They're all dangerous.

Use fire to kill them. Meanwhile I'm going to look for the gate with my friends to close it. We've done this before.

don't mind me I'm feeling silly

[tyrants_son]

1. I can handle them.

2. Tell me about this gate. ⇦

[work_wife]

I really hope you can. Don't bleed around them.

[She doesn't know. Don't lecture her for it, there is no time. She's getting everything loaded and ready to run.]

You can find it, or them, through compasses. They distort the earth's electromagnetic field or whatever. They'll be glowing red rifts in the air, or on a wall, or in the ground. They'll be surrounded by something sorta sticky moist? It will feel like pushing through some kind of mucus before you get through to the other side.

Don't go through alone. It's dangerous. The vines will try and get you. They're part of the hive mind. Oh. And if you're anywhere near one, get a mask. The air there is bad if you're around for extended periods of time.

[tyrants_son]

I don't bleed.

[He leaves it at that. Anyway, he's more interested in the part about closing gates.]

Must they be closed from within, then? The air will not be a problem for me.

audio

[sunglassesincluded]

Very well. What do you know?

[ And why does he have to explicitly request that information rather than her simply briefing the entire city at once? Such an inefficient way of handling an emergency. ]

Spoilers for Season 4 of Stranger Things

[work_wife]

The creepy creature noises are dangerous things. The screechy ones are demobats. They fly and attack in groups. Lots of teeth, three prehensile tails. They like to choke you out and eat you. The other noises, I'm guessing they're demodogs and demogorgons. And they all want to eat you.

Somewhere in the city there's a gate. Probably only one. Maybe only one. Fuck, I bet there isn't just one, if the storm from the other side is sorta coming through here. And that's a problem, because they come from beyond the gates. Back home there's a guy behind it all on the other side. A fucking insane telepath-telekinetic,-teleasshole named Henry. Vecna. One. Whatever.

Burn him. Burn them all if we want to live.

[sunglassesincluded]

[ Fire. That's nothing new at least. ]

How do we close those gates?

[work_wife]

Well, back home there was this girl with telekinetic abilities? So she closed the gates. And I don't know how we're going to do it without her. But the important thing is the mind in charge of this.

The creatures are a hivemind. But our world, I think it's not as good for them? As suitable. If we take that out, the thing that will send them after us? Then we should be okay.

[ audio ]

[ephemerios]

I feel like I just walked in on the middle of a conversation that I'm actually going to hate everything about the context of.

[ too bad this won't work!! ]

[work_wife]

Shit. Chrissy.

[The one person she least wants around for all of this.]

Stay inside. Block any doors near you, stay away from windows. In fact, find an interior room without windows. Go full tornado drill here. Be careful not to cut yourself.

Long and short, you ever feel like Hawkins has been cursed since, oh, about the time that Jonathan Byers' little brother went missing? It has. Actually it has been since longer. The reason you...

The reason Billy Hargrove died is because of stuff like this. And the guy, Bob that worked at Radio Shack. And Barbara Holland. A lot of people. All of the mall fire. It's really bad, it's really messed up, and I need you to tell me where you are because you better bet Steve and I are going to pack Eddie safely over to you before we go monster fighting again.

[ephemerios]

Yep, I definitely hate all of that!

[ In a fake-cheery voice. But, after a pause, in a more serious tone to follow: ]

That sounds like a whole lot, to be honest. [ Understatement x 1000, there. ] So, this has something to do with some Cthulhu-looking weirdo having his skin turned inside out and people seeing clocks and spiders? That and I apparently know nothing about Hawkins.

[ Hawkins, are you ok??? (fuck no Hawkins is not ok.) ]

I'm a well-established danger magnet, are you sure you guys won't be better off in the exact opposite direction of me?

[work_wife]

Oh god. You're from... You're from after Henry came from you. I'm so sorry, Chrissy.

[Now she's trying to not panic because this is the worst. Why does everyone else here have to come from after they died? This is maddening.]

You're not the only danger magnet, and you need someone who knows what is going on around to help you. But I need to try and stop this!

[newmemorywhodis]

I can fight.

[work_wife]

I really hope you can, Link. That's Link, right? I think I remember your voice.

Anyway, these things will attack just about any living animal. Especially if they're bleeding or the hivemind says they should. Oh yeah, there's a hive mind. Damn. There is so much to cover and not enough time.

Go for the head, cutting it off.

[newmemorywhodis]

Yes.

Cut head off. Okay.

[work_wife]

Be careful. I don't want you to die. Is your friend Zelda okay?

[Audio]

[heavenlyhonour]

So, what sort of creatures are we talking about?

[Intel is always good.]

[work_wife]

Monsters. Lots of claws. They have no eyes, and their mouths are made up of five petals lined with teeth. They're super dangerous.

[heavenlyhonour]

So basically they can't see and they have five rows of teeth?

[Good thing he had a sword.]

[work_wife]

I think it would be REALLY underselling here to say it has five rows of teeth. Each petal flap is LINED with them. Full of them. LOTS of teeth.

[audio]

[spinsandneedles]

What should I do if I do bleed, though?

Asking for a friend.

[work_wife]

Stop bleeding. Get away from where blood was spilled. FAST.

[spinsandneedles]

Good to know... I take it these things like blood? A lot?

[work_wife]

They're predators and they seem to use scent as their major method of getting by to find prey, so it seems like they do.