revivalproject | neck of the woods

Entry tags:

neck of the woods

WHO: Tony and his new Graq friends. Open to other absolute morons.
WHERE: Graq homeworld
WHAT: Jungle adventures! Some animal wrangling, some spelunking, more mistakes, and a date.
WHEN: Shortly after getting all of the Graq home.
WARNINGS: I cannot promise all of these alien animals are going to be treated with dignity. Edit: I don't know what either of us expected, of course it is horny. Uh, not with the animals, the animals are fine.

a. The caverns [OTA! I have no plan for this, BYO Adventure]
One of the Graq had explained on the trip over how the satellites around their planet orbited in perfect alignment to create a solar eclipse every cycle, sheering through the light reliably every morning like the moon was late to set and met the sun coming up on the horizon. They didn't explain it quite that way, of course; at first, Tony though the Graq didn't know that a solar cycle happened on any other planets and was trying to explain what night was to him, which became frustrating enough for the alien to spit a hole into the ship floor between them. So, Tony's effortless charm didn't work in Graq language. While the Graq lacked the descriptive words to convey their message to Tony, when he finally saw the phenomenon occur he paused and went, "Oh," out loud, though his erstwhile planetary guide had long since tired of him. The great shadow of the moon passed over the planet, and with it the raucous chattering of the forest around him slowed and quieted to a very queer stillness, the nocturnal animals not yet awake and the diurnal ones holding their collective breath at this early evening. It made the sound that came from inside the cave just a few feet away from where Tony stood seem loud, and close.

b. The hills [For Cayde, but you are welcome to join]
There wasn't a perfect translation into any languages that Tony knew he might share with Cayde for the giant fowl on the planet, so when the Graq tried to describe them when asked what they were eating, what Tony said to Cayde was, "Big feather," with a shrug and raised lip. They lived on steep hills, one of the Graq very intently tried to explain despite Tony definitely not asking, because they built their nests into holes they dug into them, and because of this their eggs were incredibly hard to crack without Graq spit, so do not bother. Tony did not need this warning and, again, did not ask, but now he knew and was well prepared to announce, "Big feather egg," when they came upon what looked like shards of a hollowed rock at the foot of a craggy hill. Now he was starting to sound like one of them, he was integrating to the local culture in ways he did not appreciate. The nests, as described, dotted all the way up the hill, looking like steps built into the sheerest face of it, leaving the impression of a pyramid built into this less dense part of the jungle.

'Big feather' sounded like it was going to get Tony closer to the pillow he had hoped to find for Jon than the noodles he had hoped to get for Cayde, and upon spotting one of those birds, Tony was ready to accept that this planet was not going to produce either of these gifts for him. These people didn't yet seem to have their own bread, let alone noodle, and when the Graq had said 'big' they meant enormous. More of a sword than a feather. Not pillowy down, anyway. It went stalking across the steep hill expertly, long legs fully extended and navigating the angle with sharp claws digging in to the rock to balance its fat, bobbling body, head twitching and blinking stupidly like a chicken, only approximately the size of a dinosaur.

"I don't say this often," Tony started, and it already sounded like a lie, haughty with his chin raised as he tracked the unreasonable bird, "but I am confident I am the most beautiful thing on this planet." He definitely did say that more often than he deserved to, but in this case he had sound logic. Graq were ugly, these birds were ugly, based on this sample this whole planet's evolution tended toward squashy and wrong-sized. "Present company an ongoing consideration," he was willing to allow.

c. The water [For Jon, but you are still welcome]
This was an ideal environment for plenty of very ugly bugs and grubs. Frogs, generously. Insects, in general, were not hugely upsetting for Tony, with the distinct exception of anything cockroach-like, but he did prefer a more sterile, modern, less bug-centric experience, if it were up to him, and he was realizing that he had made the wrong choice. He could have been on a spaceship right now, in space, on a ship. With the exception of the unique mineral compound of the malleable stones, there wasn't much to Tony's taste on this primitive planet.

The locals, obviously, being local and made for this environment, loved it, and appreciated being returned safely despite the awkward introductions. With a few of their rescuers on the planet with them, the Graq decided it was an ideal time to celebrate the reunion of their families, and these strange, hairless bipeds that had made that happen for them. "They want us to join them at sunset," he had translated to the camp of He-Rows, "by the waterfall, they say is over there. Follow the river, can't miss it, it's water, it's not confusing. I don't think they're going to eat us, but don't quote me on that."

Bugs on any planet, it was a universal truth, got worse the closer it was to dusk. Tony crouched by the river as the sun went down, trying to remain curious about what this planet had to offer as he felt the waxy leaf of a vibrant lilypad in a cluster that didn't seem bothered by the meandering water, only to be smacked in the face by what he would assume to be a moth on Earth, and what he didn't want to think too hard about here. "This is a nightmare," he grumbled, wiping at his cheek to make sure it hadn't left anything behind, then glanced up at the distant sound of drumming music from the direction of what must have been this waterfall site. Fashionably late, as ever.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

The warnings that the Graq had about the caves sounded like Tony was supposed to be worried about big, natural predators, not supernatural haunts, but that whine of metal sounded so out of place on this planet, its echo in the cave making Tony's hair stand on end. His first instinct was to stand very still, turning his head as slowly as possible toward to sound with wide eyes, then take several embarrassingly prancing steps blindly away from the mouth of the cave when he spotted the shadow moving within it. Big, big animal his brain decided in the low light, then greeted it with a sharp, surprised, "Hup--!?," as his hurried retreat sent Tony tripping, then falling out of sight. The sound of his impact had the same echoing quality of the caverns shortly thereafter, followed by a groan that sounded pained but was mostly from the shock of the abrupt fall into the network of caves through a hole partially hidden in the undergrowth. Leaves and dirt followed to shower down onto his head, making Tony squint cautiously through one eye up at the circle of faint, eclipsed light about him.

Really, it had not been his intention to scare the pants off of whoever had been outside the cave. Intimidate? Maybe. He considered that a survival skill, after all. But not full-on scaring, especially not of someone who appeared more human-shaped than Graq-shaped.

Natural predator though, that described the Soldier in a nutshell. He certainly probably looked like one, creeping out of the mouth of the cave, poised for a fight even as his eyes tracked the retreat-and-fall of the other person.

That's just embarrassing, he thought to himself and resisted the urge to scrub his palm over his face as if to wipe away the sight. Instead he made his way over to the depression in the ground, deliberately making noise with each bootfall; to his ears and exaggerated senses it sounded as loud as stomping. On reaching the edge of the hole he peered carefully down, still tense and ready to roll away should an attack come.

"You in one piece?" he asked, squinting against the darkness and his own shadow to see the other person. "Stark?" He thought it was Tony Stark at least; though he couldn't be completely positive in the low light.

While Tony didn't know much about mountain lion or bear behaviour, he felt sure that they didn't stomp like that, and hopeful that they wouldn't pursue an unknown adversary down a stupid hole in the ground. It was possible this logic did not apply to space-lions, but Tony's immediate recourse was to pick up a rock, just in case, which he didn't feel great about.

He wrinkled his nose when it talked to him.

"Barnes?" Tony recognized the voice more than he did the silhouette, but the stomping, the metal sound and glint off of his shoulder, the lurking around when he really did not need to do any lurking to a man, that all added up to one of the guys with this face that Tony had been acquainted with. He was pretty sure that one had disappeared off into the unknown, though, without the special coma treatment. If it had to be a person, this was quickly becoming the weirdest possible person, making Tony drop heavily back prone again in a preformative exhaustion. "My god, you're a nightmare, you could have just said hello. What were you even doing in there? Waiting for someone? You're pathological," he complained, feeling a lot like he was talking to himself in the echo of the cavern.

A rock. Well, points for using the available materials, he supposed, tracking the movement of Tony's hand. At least he appeared more defensive and not overly inclined to use his rock if not provoked; that had to count for something. Not a stellar start to a meeting, but that was fine. The Soldier tended not to make the greatest impression on others; he was used to it by now.

"No, I'm not Barnes. Yes, we all know I'm a brain damaged nightmare," he replied flatly, with the air of a man who had experienced this sort of conversation before and decided he didn't much like it. Even so he could readily admit to it being his fault that Tony was in his current situation; caves didn't just surge out of the ground to swallow people. At least, not on this planet, as far as he knew.

Maybe it would be best not to vocalize that thought.

Tony's questions presented a whole slew of topics he didn't want to explore with the other man. What are you doing always led to why are you doing it which in turn led to why aren't you doing what I think you should be doing? He experienced more of those conversations than he truly wanted, and decided not to answer any of those queries. "Do you need a hand out of there?" he asked instead.

Answers to those questions were not going to explain why Tony was in this hole, or how to get him out of it, so he wasn't really looking for them anyway, just filling the time with the sound of his own voice until a clear solution presented itself. A hand wasn't a clear solution, but a step in the right direction. Not-Barnes, but kind of, right, "You're the other one," Tony determined, sitting up enough to twirl a hand, cogs turning, the guy knew what Tony meant. He didn't really know how to verbalize that any better, coming up with, Sansa's soldier, the guy who helped Catra with her bed, all positioning the guy in relation to other people, which Tony knew he wouldn't have appreciated himself, but didn't have a better measurement when he didn't know any of these Invaders any better than he knew the dead one from his dimension. "Brain damaged one," he decided to accept as a title, as long as the guy was offering it.

Climbing to his feet, Tony finally took stock of his surroundings; tunnels twisting out of sight on either side of him, and a collection of forest floor debris around his feet, but nothing else remarkable to share. "I can't be far from that cave," he reported back. The one the Soldier was thoughtlessly lurking in, went unstated. "This is when you tell me you were making a map," he suggested.

"Yes. That one." He resisted the urge to roll his eyes for a long moment, then ultimately gave in. It was certainly dark enough to mask the movement — and did he really care if Tony saw it? He decided he didn't. What matter was someone else's opinion anyway? Nothing he did was going to change an impression. And he'd argued far too much for free will in his own decisions and opinions; he certainly wasn't going to attempt to change someone else's.

"Hmm..." He considered the cave he'd recently exited and its relative position to the hole in which his companion now stood. Chances were that the two intersected, though perhaps a bit farther back than Tony may have wanted. "I have a good memory for directions." Not for his own history, but remembering maps and directions was a mission-critical skill; HYDRA had trained their Asset well.

"I could lead you out." A beat. "Or find a rope and pull you out this way."

"Do you have a rope?" Tony doubted it, and wasn't in love with the idea of standing around under a hole and waiting for the Soldier to go in search. That sounded to Tony like a good way to find himself standing under a hole until he'd burned the daylight. He waved off the offer, and looked away toward the twisting tunnel again, sure it couldn't have been that complicated. He wanted to go generally up, not further down, easy. "I'll figure it out," he announced, then flashed the Soldier a thumbs up and a peace sign for all of his thoughtful assistance.

"No. But there are trees nearby, if a tree limb would suffice." It wouldn't be the most elegant solution, but they'd really just need to get close enough to grasp hands; the Soldier was pretty sure he could haul the other man up if he could reach.

Though perhaps Tony was just the sort of person who wanted to do things on his own. He could respect that. He sat down at the edge of the hole, considering the man trapped therein. "I would at least toss you a light."

These were all very conceptual offers, making Tony frown but not quite make it to snapping his fingers with impatience. Not everybody's process went from concept to realization that quickly, and the guy was still...hanging around. Either he was getting a kick out of Tony's predicament, or would eventually turn concepts into solutions. "Tree limb could suffice," Tony was willing to spitball if that was going to help him out, literally. "Can't be a dead one, break too easily," he offered, hand up to draw what should have been a simple conclusion for the Soldier, straight line in the air between them.

He looked to the trees again, frowning. It was possible one would yield a branch strong enough, but it would take time to find one. The Soldier got the impression that Tony wasn't one to enjoy waiting in any form.

Shrugging, he dug into one of his pockets; he hated parting with any kind of gear, but portable lighting could probably be easily replaced. The tube he pulled out wasn't quite a flashlight, but the little solar-charged device functioned closely enough to one that it should suffice.

"Catch," he called down to the man trapped in the hole. "Then twist the ring at the top of it." It wasn't the brightest light but in the dark caverns, it would be better than nothing.

The hole was very quiet for a moment before the tiny point of light appeared below the Soldier, and Tony generously accepted, "Cool." He swung the light around the cave to get a better sense of what he was working with down here, then pointlessly up at the Soldier, not quite bright enough to make it back up to the hole Tony had fallen through even if it didn't lose out to the soft light of the eclipse part way there. "Ten more of these and I might forgive you," he announced. That had to be what the light was for, after all, because Tony was finding the Soldier otherwise hard to read from this distance, and the gesture wasn't saying, stay put and don't get bored for a second, to Tony. It was saying, go further into the cave, see what you can find.

The Soldier shrugged, not quite knowing how to reply. He didn't have ten more of the lights, so it was likely a moot point. Plus, he wasn't fully sure what need he had of forgiveness, though he supposed it could be just for his existence. He did notice how he seemed to frustrate people.

"Don't have ten more," he finally replied. "Didn't want you stuck in the dark while I tried to find something to fish you out." Just because he hadn't had any trouble in the caves, didn't mean there wasn't still danger down there. If nothing else, the unfamiliar landscape could be threatening enough.

"Explore a bit if you want to find your own way, but if you don't come out in two hours, I'll come down there and try to find you." That seemed like the best compromise, unless Tony had any other ideas.

Sending someone falling down a hole could have been a trait one called 'frustrating', sure. What was more frustrating to Tony was the shrugging nonchalance with the problem, making him wrinkle his nose then mumbled incredulously, "Two hours." Like Tony had two hours to spend wandering around in a dark cave. "You know what," he called up, "for that, it's twenty now. You're running up a tab. How do you feel about indentured servitude? Too soon? I promise I'll be gentle, I just could use someone to do my laundry."

He frowned; even if he attributed a large part of Tony's words to attitude, it was still clear that no solution he had offered thus far pleased Tony. And while he didn't care much if the man liked him or not — he had a feeling it was more toward the not end of that spectrum — it was probably in his best interest to keep somewhat in his good graces on the chance that his arm might require maintenance.

And there was that whole, try to be a person thing. For the most part, he didn't much enjoy it. (A small part of his brain pointed out that as being the reason he was so bad at it. He ignored that internal voice.)

"I offered to lead you out, and you rejected it," he pointed out. "So I offered to get something to try to fish you out, and you rejected that too. Now I offered to come after you if you hadn't found your exit in a reasonable time, and you've rejected that." A beat. "It would probably be more efficient if you just told me what you want."

The Soldier, despite himself, appeared to be much more aware of when he was or wasn't being an asshole and prepared to make any attempt to correct course, than Tony was. That wasn't a high bar to clear, but did mean that he was dealing with Tony's response to his attempt to be a rational person being a petulant, "Did not." That was becoming a pattern in Tony's conversations with this man, that much Tony was aware of, making him pout but very prepared to double down with a well argued, 'Nuh-uh' if it came to it, because he didn't think he had been rejecting the offers. Just wasn't totally satisfied with their parameters, that was normal, he couldn't possibly be that high maintenance while at the bottom of a hole. Most of the time otherwise, sure.

Just to prove how very easygoing he was, Tony frowned and accepted, "Just find a branch or--come down here, if you really want to help, how is that so hard? I mean, don't, we don't both have to be stuck, but..." Okay, the conditions weren't proving anything.

"Sounded like rejection," he replied simply, though whether it was because Tony didn't like his offers or because Tony didn't like the Soldier himself, he couldn't say. He supposed that ultimately, it didn't matter; the man needed assistance, and no one else was present to provide it. No amount of petulance on Tony's part was going to cause the Soldier to be spontaneously replaced by someone he liked more.

"You don't look like the exploratory type," he finally decided, pushing himself to his feet. He appreciated the challenge of navigating the caves, but Tony Stark didn't strike him as the type to enjoy the same activities. "I will find a branch that looks sturdy."

He resisted adding the admonition don't move; Tony likely wouldn't appreciate it.

It might have been because he was keyed up already to argue, but Tony took enough offence to that assessment that he took a breath that squared his shoulders and puffed his chest, only to release it for a preemptively defeated slump. Whether or not he looked, to the Soldier, like 'the exploratory type' (did that mean he wasn't interesting? Or was his complaining that telling?), Tony did have to concede that being exploratory had likely gotten him into this situation, and he could have been back at the ship and not in a cave if he had not flirted with it. Now might not have been the time to push the trait. That left him pouting around at his surroundings, trying to blame them instead of himself, as the Soldier retreated from the circle of light above and left Tony to consider his next move. Not trying to tell him what to do next was definitely the better call, because being told not to move definitely would have sent Tony down the tunnel spitefully sooner, but they were still on a ticking clock in a battle with his curious impatience.

The Soldier had about thirty-five seconds before Tony was gone, picking his way in the direction he thought he had seen that cave entrance, only encouraged by this light the man had gifted him.

The exploratory type: noun 1. someone who, on falling down a hole in the ground and finding himself facing a series of caverns, feels excitement about the challenge they present in returning to the surface
2. not Tony Stark

Really though, the Soldier accepted that he had at least partial fault in the situation, and he did feel responsible for helping the other man get out of the hole. The most expedient method, in his mind, would be to lower something for Tony to grasp, and use it to pull him out.

Of course, in the five minutes it took him to uproot a strong sapling and bring it back to the hole, Tony must have wandered off; he no longer saw the man at the bottom of it. Sighing to himself (and absently wondering if the man got along with Steve, a thought he summarily dismissed) he sat at the edge of the hole again and called down into it. "Stark?"

He waited a moment, then called again. "Stark? I'm giving you five minutes before I come down there." Of course, he assumed that Tony was close enough to hear him. But if he wasn't, it couldn't exactly be helped.

And if that five minutes passed without Tony showing his face, well, the Soldier had taken longer falls and not willingly; jumping from the surface to the bottom of the hole would not stress his body too much.

Ten minutes was plenty of time for Tony to a) figure out a system of mounds of dirt or stone to mark where he had been and b) find trouble. He had already deleted the, what he had assumed, irrelevant information about the thing the Graq said made the caves, it had a name, didn't matter and had sounded like primitive mythbuilding at the time, but it was difficult to ignore the peculiarly consistent shape and size of the cave tunnels as they meandered around to connect to larger caverns. That didn't make the Graq's story that much more believable, Tony reasoned, just that they had crafted an explanation for a natural phenomena that they could understand, despite the fact that they didn't have a similarly fanciful one for the eclipse. Tony paused. Should he be worried? The cave entrance couldn't be far-- he pinched some of the fine dust from the tunnel floor between his fingers and watched as it wafted--back the way he had come, probably to that hole in the ceiling. Not helpful. Only, it suddenly redirected, darting back across the light that Tony had shone upward to watch it, making his eyes widen in surprise. He could practically hear that--inhale. He didn't even turn to look over his shoulder, but bolted, toppling his little markers as he sprinted back down the tunnel and hissed to himself, "Thirty years, still hoping Bucky Barnes will come to your rescue, what a nightmare."

The allotted five minutes up, the Soldier sighed and got to his feet. Tony had clearly wandered off; Tony clearly wasn't returning within the time frame the Soldier had defined. He could probably just leave him down there and attempt to wait it out, but that sounded boring. And if Tony had wandered off out of boredom, he couldn't ignore the idea that Tony might also have found trouble.

And trouble could relieve some of the boredom, honestly.

Patting himself down to make sure all his equipment was secure, he jumped into the hole. He'd gauged its depth while talking to Tony, prepared himself for the drop, but it still stung in the knees when he hit the ground, bending the joints to absorb some of the shock of impact.

Shortly thereafter, of course, Tony himself came barreling into the chamber. The Soldier cursed his own timing; had he waited but a few moments more, he'd still be at the top of the hole and able to pull the man out. But there was nothing for it; seeing Tony's agitation he immediately drew a knife with his right hand and reached out with his left in an attempt to steer the man behind him — and see the potential threat behind that.

It wasn't exactly how the fantasy usually went. Granted, the last time Tony had really thought about it, he was at least a foot shorter, and so was, he assumed, Bucky. Theoretically. That fantasy Bucky was never nearly as imposing looking, anyway, in his bright colours and little shorts, and Tony was pretty sure he preferred how this was going so far, because the Soldier looked more prepared to take on an alien beast than the boy wonder. "Big worm!" Tony announced helpfully as he zipped by, sliding in the dirt as he rounded the Soldier by catching him around the arm and coming to a tentative stop behind his shoulder. In Tony's defence, he was prepared to argue for his own dignity, he was at his best fighting from the air, with a lot of space to move and control. This close quarters thing was for the supersoldiers.

The threat came crashing through the tunnel, all gaping mouth with a ridge of horns or teeth or--something, something that didn't belong on a worm, circling it like a crown that dragged runnels through the dirt, letting it rifle its way through the rocks to create the distinct shape of the passages. That was not something Tony would recommend fighting with a knife. He gave a tug to the Soldier's arm, eyes wide and black in the dark.

No boy wonder costuming here (though arguments could be made about Steve's original uniform). The Soldier has kept to a simple theme: black, and as close to leather-and-kevlar tactical gear as possible. In an environment like the caverns, little-to-no light and deep shadows, it would hopefully prove a boon.

Then again, an underground burrowing worm large enough to carve tunnels with its bulk likely had way more advantage.

He cursed under his breath, falling back into Russian because honestly, the harsh sounds to the language suited it well. Guns weren't part of his current inventory — mostly due to mistrust of the Agrii data points — and their current positioning didn't give them any advantage for taking it down with what he had on him. Best to retreat then, attempt to get away now and worry about finding an exit after.

Or a better chance to take the beast down. He hadn't discounted that possibility.

"Run," he urged Tony, moving into that tug, away from the worm. "The far tunnel. Go."

Tony didn't need to be told twice, but kept a tight grip on the Soldier's arm as if to make sure they were both actually running and he wasn't feeding the guy to the worm for his own heroic escape. He only let go as they crowded into the tunnel and couldn't keep a pace side by side in the narrow passage, tearing ahead with the faint glow of the light the Soldier had given him to try to assess what they were running into before it became the next problem. Sliding in the dirt and skidding around narrow corners that had him bumping his shoulders against the rocks was irritatingly familiar, why was it always giant underground bugs lately?, but he didn't have the flares or Cayde's gunslinging to settle the issue this time.

"We're going down!" Tony announced, sure the Soldier had felt that slope, too, but still feeling it necessary to make very clear to the gathered assembly, "Down is bad!"

As they run, the Soldier kept looking from side to side, hoping for a smaller tunnel or crevasse that they can take to get away from the worm. Something that they could fit into and it couldn't would be fine — or a sharp turn they could take to get out of its immediate path.

Unfortunately they hadn't been that lucky thus far. And the tunnel definitely took a downward slope beneath their feet.

"Down is fine!" Down was better than crushed or eaten by a giant worm. Plus when he was exploring earlier, some of the tunnels had opened into larger caverns. If they were lucky, they would hopefully encounter one — maybe with some nice ledges on the wall that they could climb up and get out of the path of their pursuit. And as long as he was wishing, a good, strong rope and a pair of Sigs wouldn't go amiss either. "Anything that opens into a larger space gives us room to maneuver around it!"

A larger space like a tomb that this worm regularly stalked its prey to, and this whole pursuit was just a game that they were meant to lose at the bottom of a pit full of skeletons. This was a lofty concept for Tony to vocalize while he ran, so he made a noise of complaint that abruptly cut off as he came to a sudden stop, then doubled back, all but crashing into the Soldier. Tony grabbed him by the collar and hauled him to the side into where the light had caught a strange surface, then shadow; a narrow crevasse, like he had been hoping for, that Tony had to jam himself into, then drag the broader Soldier against the squeeze of the rocks with him, just as the worm slammed the side of its horny head against the wall they retreated into. Tony found he had to cut off an alarmed exclamation, not sure how he was supposed to address this man, and decided it was a perfectly normal time to ask, "Do you really not have a name?" Crushed between the rocks, jagged darkness cutting further into the ground to one side and angry worm monster to the other, Tony said, "I think you deserve one."

THAT'S NOT ANY LESS SPOOKY

Mwahaha, etc., etc.

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