network; video

[kyley_b]

((Post event. CW: discussions of violence, body horror, injury and loss of limb in comments.))


[The feed shows a skinny redhead who is somehow even paler than usual - his skin is parchment white, with deep dark pouches under his eyes. His curls are matted.

Yeah, he looks like shit.]

Uhm. Hi. Hi, uh. It's Kyle. Uhm.

I. Uh. Is. Is everybody okay? I hope you're all okay. Uhm. I'm...

[His face crumples.] I'm not. I'm not okay, I'm SO not okay.

Comments

[dr_riley]

[ Touch is one of Drake's two strongest love languages and it always has been. You'd never guess it, though, from how anxious and uncomfortable he is with it. He straightens immediately and moves forward, putting out a hand, hesitating, and finally resting it on Kyle's arm. ]

I know, mate. It's alright. You go sit down. I'll finish the tea and...we can talk about how shite this place and everything in it is. Yeh?

[kyley_b]

[It takes every inch of his willpower not to turn into Riley and hug him. Instead Kyle nods miserably and goes to sit in one of his wooden kitchen chairs. He folds his arms on the table and puts his face into them, sobbing until he can't anymore.

That's the thing about tears - eventually they dry up.

Feeling a little nauseous, a lot snotty, but at least hollowed out in an exhausted way, he lifts his head again. When he speaks his voice is froggy.]

Sorry.

[dr_riley]

[ It isn't that Drake doesn't know what Kyle needs or even that he doesn't want to provide it. (The dad in him is really aching to, actually.) It's more that he's spent a long time being told Nobody Wants Your Hugs and is still near the beginning of his journey of self-reclamation. When Kyle looks up, Drake is sitting across from him and both mugs of tea sit steaming on the table. He shakes his head. ]

You need to stop apologizing. You're allowed to grieve and get angry. Get frustrated by tasks that used to be simple. Feel less than whole. Feel less than useful. You're going to go through all of it. I did, anyway.

[kyley_b]

How did it happen to you?

[He takes his cup of tea gratefully.]

You don't have to tell me. But I'd really like to know.

[dr_riley]

Right. [ he does that frowny pursed lips nod that people do when thinking about something troubling ] Been wondering when you might ask. Exactly what authority does this self inflated git think he has, telling people about losing a hand when he's clearly got both his feckin' hands?

[ Drake takes his jacket off and lays his left arm on the table. Perhaps four inches below the elbow is a thin, pale line that goes all the way around. ]

My team and I were helping a small network of villages to industrialize. They were good people with a resource-rich land that they were having trouble utilizing efficiently. In exchange for a percentage of the minerals, we would outfit them with the means to refine and keep track of labor and output. I designed some of the machinery and wrote the software and built a seventy second scale working model of an ore processing unit.

[ He pauses and sucks his lips in for a few moments ]

There was some uh...some civil unrest. Most supported the endeavor, but there were factions that didn't trust us, or didn't want outsiders taking any of their resources, or thought the progress we were promising was the first step toward an immoral, godless society steeped in debauchery. So some unrest broke out, and... [ shrug ] I got - I got pushed into the model while it was [ very loud exhale ] churning away. Flung my hand out, you know, to catch myself, and......in it went.

[kyley_b]

Heh. I wasn't thinking that, exactly. I figured if you offered to come talk to me something was cut off of you. No offense but you don't much seem like the type to just randomly wanna talk to some depressed guy.

[Kyle looks at Drake's arm, listening intently as he talks. When he gets to the end of his story, Kyle winces.]

Dude. Oh my god, dude. That's horrible.

[dr_riley]

It was...

[nod]

...yeh, it was horrifying.

[ He rubs the palm of his shouldn't-be-there hand with his thumb thoughtfully for a few moments, then flexes his fingers ]

This uh....isn't that hand. I mean, obviously. Mine was completely [cough] co-uh completely shredded. My brother-in-law had to shoot it off. Don't really remember that part, just um. This violent, full-body jarring. Needed to be done, but I give him shit about it anyway.

[kyley_b]

You got a transplant? That's pretty impressive. Does it have as much sensation and functionality?

[He finally smiles a little.] I plan to give Kaz shit about cutting off my fucking hand for, well. Ever.

[dr_riley]

[ sorryyy, I haven't forgotten the thread, things have just been very hard lately. I lost a good friend to covid and that kind of sucks the joy out of things. ]


Yeeeeeah... [ Drake flexes his fingers, watching them thoughtfully. ] It's actually... Well it's a long story, but in the interest of not waffling on, it was grown for me by an advanced race of people for whom I solved a very big problem. So yeah, it...it's precisely like version 1.0.

Before this, I had a prosthetic for a few years, and before that, it was a year and change of masking behind 'look, no hands' jokes.

[ He makes a face at Kaz's name. ]

Kaz? You mean that greasy joyless bastard with the cane who's read too much Gothic fantasy? Pardon my saying so, but he seems entirely too skeevy.

[kyley_b]

[oh my god don't even worry about it! Real Life is always more important, and I'll be around whenever. I'm so sorry about your friend, that's terrible.]


Dude. Whoa. They could grow it after all that time? That's intense. I'll get a prosthetic, looks like. But it's still scary. [He only admits this because Riley knows how it feels.

At that description Kyle burst into laughter.]

Yeah, him. He's a friend. [Or so Kyle thinks, anyway.]

[dr_riley]

[ thanks. /hug I've been finding little distractions here and there. Just to take the edge off. ]

[ Drake doesn't blink, wince, or hesitate. It is scary. ]

It's horrifying. It took me a long time to get used to it. And just when I had, I got fitted with a robot arm, a really cool one, but...

...well, it was still something I wore a glove over, until Gene started making Michael Jackson jokes.

[ When Kyle explains that Kaz is a friend, he lets out an incredulous little huff ]

You say so. I'd be careful with what you say around him, though.

[kyley_b]

They have Michael Jackson where you're from? [He manages a smile.] Not my favourite guy, but that's a story for another time I'm sure.

Yeah? How come? I'm not hiding ay big secrets he could possibly be interested in. I'm pretty sure everyone here knows everything about me. [Liar.]

[dr_riley]

Oh yes, Michael Jackson, Tony Blair, Martha Stewart. Infinite realities, you know. Bound to be infinite near-identical ones.

[ Drake takes that moment to sip at his tea, and when Kyle asks why, he grimaces over the rim. ]

He doesn't know the first thing about doctor patient confidentiality, for one. Smarmy blighter wanted me to tell him whatever I found out from interviewing Mr. Kaplan - ie, none of his damned business.

[kyley_b]

It's trippy to think about.

That's kinda fucked up, yeah. Like I don't know why he would care.

You know, you're not nearly as much of a dick as you come off at first.