[text]

[complicatedliar]

[The message comes in from a seemingly unknown device (thank you Delta) with the only name on it as GHIDORAH.]

Well hello, hello, friends and foes, boxers and briefs.

If you'd asked me yesterday if I thought I'd end up on an alien planet with a day that runs longer than Ben Hur, trapped in a spaceship full of stranger's farts flavored with protein paste, I would've told you to stop being an asshole and share those obviously superior drugs you were on. Yet here we all are.

Since I know nobody's busy right now, how about some homework from Uncle Ghidorah?

1) Name the one food you wish you had here most.

2) Explain the plot of your favorite movie/whatever they call entertainment on your shithole planet in exactly seven words.

3) [This space left intentionally blank]

4) Fuck/Marry/Kill (you only get to use people here because otherwise you might as well be tellings us about your imaginary friends)

5) You're the main character in the last book you read. How fucked are you?

Hail to the king, baby.

Comments

[stillgotmyleftarm]

Are you boxers or briefs, is what I wanna know.

[complicatedliar]

Oh, someone's a little cheeky.

Never ask a Scotsman what's under his kilt, cupcake. Unless you really want to find out.

[stillgotmyleftarm]

I just figured, if you're asking all these questions, maybe you should answer some.

[complicatedliar]

Okay fine, but I don't send dick pics. I'm not that kind of girl.

[stillgotmyleftarm]

I think I can live with that.

Okay, so - pick one of your questions to answer, and so will I.

[complicatedliar]

5. I'm literally being done in the butt by an anthropomorphic unicorn.

[stillgotmyleftarm]

You must read some really interesting books.

[complicatedliar]

It's amazing what you can find on the internet, is all I'm saying. There's something for everyone.

[stillgotmyleftarm]

Amazing and terrifying.

Sometimes I kinda miss life without it, not gonna lie.

But where else would we get questionnaires like these, I guess, to pass the time while we're stuck.

[complicatedliar]

Exactly.

I mean, without the network, we'd have to actually talk to people.

And gathering gossip would just be so much slower. Yuck.