[text]

[complicatedliar]

[The message comes in from a seemingly unknown device (thank you Delta) with the only name on it as GHIDORAH.]

Well hello, hello, friends and foes, boxers and briefs.

If you'd asked me yesterday if I thought I'd end up on an alien planet with a day that runs longer than Ben Hur, trapped in a spaceship full of stranger's farts flavored with protein paste, I would've told you to stop being an asshole and share those obviously superior drugs you were on. Yet here we all are.

Since I know nobody's busy right now, how about some homework from Uncle Ghidorah?

1) Name the one food you wish you had here most.

2) Explain the plot of your favorite movie/whatever they call entertainment on your shithole planet in exactly seven words.

3) [This space left intentionally blank]

4) Fuck/Marry/Kill (you only get to use people here because otherwise you might as well be tellings us about your imaginary friends)

5) You're the main character in the last book you read. How fucked are you?

Hail to the king, baby.

Comments

text | un: leprechaun

[alaspooryork]

[Oh, why not. He's bored enough.]

1. The barbecue jackfruit tacos from Tasty's Tacos, although I would accept any similar substitute.

2. The Tempest, only Ariel is a robot.

3. [redacted]

4. I do not know sufficient people here well enough to say.

5. If nonfiction, I would be dead of the dysthrophe virus, or possibly infected by it but still alive as a space zombie. If fiction, I would at least have access to an FTL engine and control over its destination, which is better than the current situation.

text | un: leprechaun

[complicatedliar]

[Well, if Delta is going to answer, he'll mess with him a bit. Have to keep up appearances, after all.]

1. Uh oh, vegetarian alert.

2. Uh oh, nerd alert.

3. [redacted] [redacted]

4. This is such a fucking cop out.

5. Fiction > Nonfiction, always. Nonfiction is boring.

[alaspooryork]

[Excellent.]

1. The city I was in previously was low on fresh meat. It is more habit than anything else.

2. Guilty as charged.

3. [message unavailable]

4. And yet killing is so permanent.

5. It also provides a more positive outcome for the question, in this particular instance, so I will agree.

[complicatedliar]

1. What a sad-ass city.

4. Only if you do it right.

5. Truth is stranger than fiction blah blah blah.

[alaspooryork]

1. You are not incorrect. In many ways I prefer it here.

4. I was not aware there were other ways.

5. A misconception brought about by a lack of sufficient imagination; however as knowledge is a prerequisite for imagination in most cases, it can certainly seem that way. Additionally, there are always those who prefer a phenomenon to have a mystical explanation rather than a scientific one.

[complicatedliar]

1. That's fucking sad too. There's no hot water.

4. Mysterious ways.

5. Have I mentioned you're a nerd?

[alaspooryork]

1. I will take a lack of hot water over the confidence that my memories are my own.

4. Ways you are not willing to share, I assume.

5. Not yet. However, I will gladly claim the title.

[complicatedliar]

1. Making a lot of assumptions about how nice the aliens are playing, here.

4. I'm an international three-headed dragon of mystery.

5. Better embroider it in your shorts in case you lose them.

[alaspooryork]

1. Let us call it optimism for the time being. Optimism and lack of proof otherwise.

4. That is undeniable.

5. Insufficiently specific. There are many nerds present.

[complicatedliar]

1. You know what they call an optimist where I'm from? Chum.

5. Green nerd oughta do it.

[alaspooryork]

1. That has evolved into a word meaning "companion" in my time.

5. I will accept that.