revivalproject | What It All Comes Down To

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What It All Comes Down To

WHO: Tommy Shepherd, OTA
WHERE: Around Temba
WHAT: Coming Down From It All (Post House of Billy)
WHEN: The first week post event [Forward Dated]
WARNINGS: CW: Referenced sexual encounter in thread with Kyle, Referenced child abuse in thread with Kyle.

A. Keeping The Diners Supplied The Diner
"Delivery of fresh produce."

Tommy's tired. Perhaps that's why he's coming in later than normal with supplies for this meal shift. Perhaps that's why he looks frazzled and his hair is limp and he's not racing in with all speed. Clearly it's not the heavy crate loaded down with all sorts of foods from the green house, because that's never slowed him down before. But sleep after something like what they'd gone through was... Well, unlikely.

"The cyanana harvest is starting, so I'm thinking about trying to figure out how to make some sorta pudding out of it. That's a thing, right? Banana pudding or something."

He'd been enough out of it on entering that he didn't even know who it was he was talking to. Like hell he'd thought about how the kitchen help rotation was working now. Nor did he care. He was too tired from all his dreams to care.

B. Healing Power of Horticulture The Greenhouse
If there was one place that Tommy often found peace, it was the greenhouse. Today Tommy was trying his best to work there without getting too complicated with other people. For this he'd done the best thing he could do: working the mint wing. The advantage that came that the specific wing was sealed off from the rest of the greenhouse to keep it from spreading too much. Tommy moved slowly through it with a woven rush basket, humming quietly under his breath some German pop music he remembered from back home. While he moved he clipped little sprigs of mint to pass on to Glownies as a treat.

The advantage of the sealed area was that when the doors opened, Tommy knew someone was there. He could hear it. He turned to look at the door and frowned.

"Can I help you? I thought I was soloing the mint today."

C. The Solitary Island Closed to Aeon
It took a while for him to find her, but Tommy had wanted to have an excuse to get away, but he didn't want to be put into a position where his stupid brain could interrupt him. There had been someone interested after all, and so he'd raced through the city until he found her.

"Aeon," he said, offering a hand up for a high five. "You doing anything? Because if not, island time."

D. Wild Card
[Feel free to hit me up on Discord or Plurk to discuss places Tommy could get cornered. Or just have someone come to his actual home. Other options are to find him lazing by the fountain, on top of a tall building, or hiding out with the glownies which he normally does not visit.]

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The storm he made after Teddy disappeared wasn't that... well, it wasn't that bad of a thing. Not really. But Tommy sighed, rubbing the back of his head.

"I don't know if there is a parallel in how they work, Ezra. He alters reality with his voice. With his will. He commands what he wants. He's a reality warper, and that's rare, super rare."

And super scary. And divine in Billy's case. But he agreed that it was protecting himself.

"He said they were hurting him."

Ezra had never thought the storm was a bad thing, per se. Just concerning because it hadn't seemed to be intentional, on Billy's part. That lack of conscious control seemed to hint at the potential for danger.

Although at the moment he's diverted to being far more concerned about danger to Billy.

"They?" he presses. "Someone here on Agra-10?"

"I don't know, he's been sleeping. I don't... I don't know."

And the frustration comes out with a trembling around him. The world shaking, just a bit in his power.

Well, that was kinda concerning, too. He takes a deep breath, tucks his hands into the sleeves of his robe and breathes out, trying to hold to being steady and calm without actively projecting it.

"Ok, Tommy. Then that question will wait until he wakes up." Speculating wouldn't help Billy, or Tommy, or anyone else.

It definitely wouldn't help Tommy, who was not doing well at all. He straightens, turning at last to look fully at Ezra.

"No, the question is here now. And it's waiting, and I hate waiting. I hate being here instead of there, but I can't do anything there, so I fucking wait."

"Waiting must suck exponentially more for you than most people," Ezra realizes. The speed factor.

"Ok, so. Things I'm thinking. If there are people, here and now, who have hurt Billy, I don't want them to get at him again to hurt him more. And I don't believe anything needs to be 'done' about Billy like he's..some sort of thing. Because, look-" He rubs at his face.

"Full disclosure. My gifts are more along the lines of minds and emotions and connection."

He pauses for a second. "Although clearly altering memories is somewhere in his power set, too, however that works." He shakes his head.

"Not the point. The point is I've done the...getting scared and angry enough I'm calling predators big enough to eat people, without really knowing what I'm doing. I've used rage to bend people to my will to walk them right off cliffs, knowing exactly what I was doing. And honestly, freaked myself out pretty badly with that stuff. The people I cared about most just tried to help me with everything I was going through. I want to do what I can to help Billy have that, rather than him worrying about people being mad at or scared of him. Or being mad at or scared of himself."

That was both about having sympathy and compassion and practical, in his mind. Billy in a spiral could just go really badly, for everyone.

Smart man, Ezra. It was worse for Tommy, because his mind raced so fast. His mind didn't even understand the same rate of time as others. It took too much practice to keep sane around other people, to slip into 'normal people' time. So really, his patience was INSANELY high. It just wasn't enough.

Still, he offers a smile over the whole idea that Ezra agreed that he didn't want Billy to get hurt. He's seen too many people want his brother and mother to suffer for things beyond them.

But he raises an eyebrow.

"You're am empath. My cousin Luna is like that. And his power set is whatever he can imagine and put into words. This place weakens him. A lot."

Still, he almost thinks he can respect Ezra in this moment. Because it sounds like he really does know. Like he gets it. Billy's scared of his power, that's going to increase now, like it always does when things go weird.

"I'm just glad when it was all going bad he didn't tap into his other powers. He's sorta electrokinetic."

Tommy rolled up a sleeve, showing a jagged electrical burn scarred into his arm.

"He did this, when he was out of control of himself."

"Imagination and will and emotion can all be part of wielding the Force," Ezra offers as he studies the burn.

"Speed of light," he muses. "One of the few things that you couldn't outrun. I know Force users can make lightning, but the only technique I know anything about is the Sith way. Which is focusing on hate, and I don't want to do that. I bet it's possible to deflect with a lightsaber. Maybe catch it without one."

Something to ask Master Kenobi about.

Yeah yeah, Space Monk Nonsense whatever. And he really doesn't like the idea that the guy is thinking about his brother as possibly bad and hateful. He doesn't like that at all.

"Not all Sith are bad," he answered, moving to find his basket and gather it up. "Except that Kylo guy. The others that were here, before all you Jedi people showed up, they were nice."

That really wasn't what Ezra had meant, especially where Billy was concerned. He can't tell what Tommy is thinking, but he has an inkling something rubbed the speedster the wrong way.

"If they lived here and weren't busy being control, manipulate, and destroy full on jerks, I can't do anything but glad. It doesn't match my experiences at the hands of Sith which are things like watching them kill and enslave a lot of people, attempted murder, kidnapping, and if they were even a little bit nice to me, it didn't last when I didn't do what they wanted. I didn't like the way I started acting when I tried learning from a Sith holocron, either."

"The diner? Started by someone from some Empire or something. Eli, Thrawn, they were good. The Sith Lord, I liked him too. He was... Well, I think he was as close to a liberal Sith as one could get, from what I saw of his memories."

Everyone was complex, in their own contexts. Sometimes they weren't villains so much as stuck in a shitty system.

His expression visibly stutters at the mention of the Grand Admiral, and he goes more pale.

"...Thrawn. He was here for a while. Right. I knew that. I'd...forgotten." He'd even checked network logs, and it sure looked and sounded like the same man. But he'd put it aside. Not relevant, and fretting that Thrawn might reappear wouldn't do any good.

"If there's something he cares about more than winning and power, or his stupid collection he doesn't have any right to, then...good," he chokes out, he says, trying to mean it, but feeling more a flash of vicious satisfaction, before he lets out a shuddering breath.

His voice drops to a whisper. "Maybe if whatever is actually controlling things here drops me back right to the moment I came from, he won't kill me immediately."

Woah, someone stepping up to start shit about his friend? Tommy gives Ezra a very hard look.

"He did care about something. Someone. Eli Vanto. I think they worked together. And you don't know what he went through to become who he was. I do. You've never been through a Calibration, never been forced to see another's life."

And he knew Thrawn was capable of good things. And he knew Thrawn had nowhere to go back to.

"I guess Space Monks don't learn that it's important to give people a second chance."

Ezra stares back.

"I just told you that a lot of why I didn't go a lot further down a really bad path was other people, included my master, giving me a second chance. If you say Thrawn would take it, and try to do better, then. Good. He won't have to answer to the Emperor if we end up as far from home as I think we will," he realizes, out loud. It might, actually, be good. But he'll believe it when he sees it.

"I'm allowed to be angry that he massacred unarmed civilians on my home world, Tommy. I surrendered and handed myself over to get him to stop. And when I tried to call him out face to face, he told me flat out told power was what was important; I'm allowed to have some skepticism that he'd want to behave any differently until I see him try."

Really? Massacred? Well, the Thrawn Tommy knew hadn't been like that at all. All he can speak to is his own experience. And he definitely didn't know how to argue against that. But then he thought he might have an answer.

"I'm sorry he hurt those people. And he should face justice for that. You shouldn't have had to do that to stop him. I acknowledge that. Doesn't change that he was my friend. If you've got a problem with me being friends with some version of Thrawn, yours or otherwise, then we've got an issue."

Because Tommy doesn't apologize for who he saw as friends.

Ezra's quiet for a long moment, before he shrugs and says quietly, "I tried to be Maul's friend, and he'd done at least as bad. He just wasn't a very good friend back. He hurt my family. Clung to hatred and kept trying to kill the first version of Master Kenobi I met. Until Obi-wan didn't really have much of a choice but to fight him again and take him down for good. I know more about why Maul was the way he was now. I'd probably try to be his friend again if some version of him ended up here."

Or Anakin Skywalker, for that matter. He's never been as properly afraid of Vader as maybe he should be, and he doesn't see how he could possibly have any chance at getting through to him if Obi-wan, and Padme, and Ahsoka all failed. But he loves all of Anakin's family that he's ever met too much not to try, for their sake.

"So. No issue on my end, Tommy. I'd much rather focus on what we can do to help Billy."

Help Billy. Tommy shakes his head.

"I'll figure that out when he wakes up. But Billy's a Maximoff, and that makes him my responsibility, not yours."

He had failed to protect his brother. He didn't know how yet, but he knew that this was his own failing. He had told himself he'd be a good brother, and he'd protect his brother. A Maximoff speedster was responsible to their witch.

Ezra frowns.

"He's your family, I get that. That doesn't mean some of the rest of us can't help, too."

Tommy bristled, glaring at Ezra.

"Yeah, like people wanted to help my mom after her break. Wait, no, they wanted to kill her. And I'm not letting that happen here. I'm not letting any of you hurt him."

Which wasn't rational to say. Ezra had said that he didn't want to hurt Billy, that he wanted to help. But fuck if Tommy didn't believe people when a witch in his family lost control. Didn't believe them at all.

"Come on, Tommy," Ezra replies, muffled a little by running a hand over his face.

"I just talked you through I think about this stuff. What can I do to prove it to you?"

Frankly, he doesn't know. But he looks... defensive. Very defensive.

"It's not something words can do," Tommy answered, standing straighter. "Actions, no hurting him, not yelling at him, not pushing him. But mostly, it's going to be up to him."

And if no one hurts his brother, then it's better.

It doesn't take the Force to sense the defensiveness, although yeah, it's good confirmation. And no matter what Tommy is feeling, what he says right that moments strikes Ezra as pretty reasonable.

After all, Ezra had spent years not really trusting anyone until the Spectres had come back to a Star Destroyer just to rescue him. He nods.

"I did say 'do'," he says, hoping he sounds reasonable right back. "And that all makes sense to me. Ok."

"AS for the rest? Right now, I'm here because I'd wanted to be alone," Tommy answered.

There was so much going on in his mind, so much he feared, and the conversation just reminded him of what he was trying to not know, not remember, not feel.

Ezra's still for a beat, and then he nods again. "Got it."

He starts to turn away, and pauses one more time, to say in a rush, "My comms open to either of you anytime, ok?"

And then he doesn't even wait around for a reply before he ducks out of the mint wing.

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What It All Comes Down To

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