revivalproject | Make your Statement, face your fear.

Entry tags:

Make your Statement, face your fear.

WHO: Jonathan Sims & YOU
WHERE: Jon's Calibration Room
WHAT: Explore the Archivist's mind
WHEN: During the Calibration Event [ June 3rd - July 10th ]
WARNINGS: EYES - Body horror, possible mentions of unsettling events including kidnapping, death and dreadful monsters

The Archivist's office is a mess. Most offices are. Especially offices located in basements. Offices that belong to equally chaotic archives. And the archives of the Magnus Institute are incredibly chaotic. Gertrude Robinson has seen to that. And yet the mess in this office isn't hers. It's the mess of the current Archivist, right now seated behind his cluttered desk, appearing even smaller than he actually is, the small lamp on the table serving as the only actual source of light in this room. In front of the Archivist sits a small pile of statement files on a dining plate, but his attention isn't on the files, it's on his visitor.

There are more of these files spread all over the room. Cardboard boxes full of them stacked high and pushed into whatever free corner has once existed in it. Further boxes are stacked less high or are plain lying around, some closed, some opened, some rummaged through. Other, smaller boxes that aren't filled with files join the previous ones. There are also a few metal shelves covering part of the walls. And file cabinets. There are more files in these as well as more boxes and books. Most of them scientific in nature, some deal with the arcane, myths and legends. Various types of tape recorders and boxes of tapes are also widely strewn about as well as loose pages of paper, the occasional tea mug and cobwebs. For some reason or another there are at least a dozen fire extinguishers to be spotted throughout the room, and it likely isn't due to the clearly used ashtray or the golden lighter with a cobweb design engraved onto it on the desk near the Archivist's dust-covered laptop, untouched cup of tea and the sole human rib. Aside from more stray sheets of paper and some writing equipment, a single book also resides on the desk, its title introducing it as A Guest for Mr. Spider.

Though there is more to be found in the various shelves as well. A knife as well as a cleaver, an unsuspecting whistle that seems to be surrounded by an odd fog and will vanish should one try to reach for it. Underneath one of the shelves, there even is a plain cardboard box filled with C-4 plastic explosives. Further up, a roughly football-sized dark sun dares the visitor to look at it to plunge them into utter and complete darkness. The frisbee some may recognize as a certain someone's shield seems a little out of place as it lays unassuming on one of the higher shelves, covering an odd little action figure from view.

But maybe one feels more compelled to look out of the window, suspiciously present in this basement office. Outside lies the vastness of space, set to incite the feeling of falling right into it unless one pulls away from the sight in time. Or the human-sized mannequin standing motionless in one of the corners, wearing an ancient gorilla skin along with its top hat and a wide, leery, painted-on grin. It has no eyes. The pulsing, black and red veins creeping along the walls of the office and present themselves in varying sizes and thicknesses may also draw the visitor's attention. Or the seemingly harmless and somewhat misplaced looking yellow door draws them in, just there on the wall behind that coffin lying on the floor as if it belongs there. Thick chains are wrapped around it with a padlock holding them close, key stuck inside and inviting the visitor to unlock it. Just ignore the large letters carved into its wood imploring you to 'DO NOT OPEN' the casket. It'll be fine.

Yet... How tempting all of these things may be, the visitor may be unable to entirely ignore the MASSIVE EYE taking up the entire ceiling of the room, glowing an eerie green and watching their every move. Or any of the other eyes scattered around the room. The walls, the cabinets, the shelves, the side of the Archivist's desk, the corners, the floor, the Archivist's forehead. All shapes and sizes and colors and all of them watching the visitor unblinking, unjudging. Just following their every move around the room - Just as the Archivist himself does.

Maybe you want to look around, and maybe you just want to take a seat in that single empty chair before the Archivist's desk. There is just enough room between it and the casket to not feel too cramped in. As for the trap door next to the Archivist's desk... Now that one won't open just yet.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Cloud nods in return, he'll stick close to the desk and crosses his arms loosely against his chest. It'll keep his hands from wanting to wander.

He looks at Jon wondering if he'll talk about something other than the terrors. "How is your world doing?"

"M-my world?" Jon looks a little perplexed for a moment, but then gives a short look around, appearing almost guilty.

"Oh, w-well.... I suppose- It... It's doing fine? Normal people just... They aren't aware that there are evil powers attempting to destroy it. And- That's fine. No one really there to fight them anyway." He shrugs with a little sigh and lets his eyes settle on the nearest tape recorder.

Cloud's eyebrows raise at Jon's guilt.

He gives a small smile at what the other says. "I know what you mean. If I were there I would be fighting for them. It's what I did back on my world. It's what I still do."

"Yes, I... I remember." He tips his head from one side to the other and gestures slightly with his hand. "Unfortunately my world doesn't have any heroes to fight for it. It feels like the Entities and their avatars sabotaging one another is the only reason it hasn't turned into a hellscape yet. Some of us join this absurd little game without even knowing what's going on." Which Cloud may take as some sort of a confession. There are no heroes, only monsters. And Jon is one of them.

Cloud tilts his head at Jon. "If no heroes and only those things, how do you stop it from hurting everyone else? Like the people you care about?"

He is interested in that part. SOLDIER was turning into a den full of monsters. Cloud and his friends stood up for the planet when it needed it. But he had a consequence later on to deal with.

"So, you're all monsters or fears? Is that it?"

Jon shrugs in response, refusing to look up "Most avatars... They don't care. I feel like- The longer one is an avatar, the more ruthless one becomes? There are some pure monsters as well, but... y-yes."

Taking a brief moment to direct his gaze up at the ceiling, Jon finally points up at the massive eye above and takes a deep breath "-that one. That's.... That's me. I am the Archivist, avatar of the Eye. The ceaseless Watcher. The fear of being watched, followed, having your secrets known. I had- I... I didn't even know these things existed until after I allegedly... Chose to... become one of them."

Edited 2020-06-16 03:30 (UTC)

"Monsters?" Cloud questions it softly since he's seen a lot of them, fought a lot them, killed a lot of monsters. He could easily become a monster if Hojo had been successful.

The blond looks up towards the ceiling at the massive eye. All seeing, all knowing. It makes sense to how Jon can keep hold of information. He knew every fear in here but they had been all fears. "How do you chose when you don't know about it?"

"Monsters." Jon simply nods. "Creatures that, unlike avatars, weren't human once."

As for Cloud's other question, Jon shrugs. "It's... It's in the decisions you make without thinking too much about them. For me it was my relentlessly pushing on to figure out who murdered the previous Archivist. My hunt for knowledge, for understanding, regardless the cost. And, of course, that I chose not to die when I had the chance. For some of us, our actions are what makes out choice."

"I know all about monsters. It's what I kill over in my world." Cloud glances over at Jon. "Mostly if they are threats." Vincent had been a bit special in regards to the monster rule. "I'll be sure to write down about what mako exposure does too since that's all related to the Lifestream."

Cloud could write down a lot of information for Jon. "You went seeking for knowledge and then ended up becoming something. That choice wasn't really yours. How does that make you feel?"

Cloud's rather casual mention of killing monsters makes Jon flinch a little before he nods in appreciation of the promised writings. "Thanks. I'm looking forward to reading what you have to share." And, of course, record it.

"How it makes me feel..." Jon mutters, not quite sure how to even answer, and it shows on his face. "To be honest, I'm not sure. I still feel... Very confused by a lot of what's happening. Irritated at times. I think... For a good part I just feel... Unprepared? For whatever it is that's being expected of me."

Cloud carefully watches Jon's reaction. He knows that what he said was nonchalant. Its what SOLDIERs were basically made for. He was made to fight all the time as well. "You'll understand what I mean."

"Aren't we all unprepared for things that come your way?" He sighs at that own line since he had came into a bunch of annoying things. Cloud puts his a hand on top of the desk while looking at Jon. "Do you feel that you would ever become a threat here?"

And Jon sure hopes he will understand. At the moment he remains a little worried. And Cloud's final question, paired with the hand placed squarely on his desk, which makes Jon wonder whether or not he is supposed to consider it a threat, leaves the Archivist a little less certain with himself even.

"I, I- I... I don't know. I really don't- I- I hope not?" Jon sputters, leaning away a little. He hardly knows what precisely he is turning into, so how would he know how much of a threat he could turn out to be?

Cloud didn't mean to frighten Jon. His intention was to be less threatening. But that never seems to be the case around here. It could be the shear determination that he has plus that overall soldier feel. Plus it's been a while since he interacted with people in a personal setting. He's not used to this and he never really did such encounters before. He pulls his hand away from the desk realizing that could have came across as something other than his original intention.

"If you feel at any one point that you might be. Let someone know or tell me. I'm not afraid to apprehend or knock you out if needed." He's not here to kill other people being brought from their worlds to here. Cloud will offer his help where he can really put it. If a threat comes their way he'll be able to handle it. But when it comes to people with no control over their own abilities that's not fair to them. Cloud could have easily become a monster long ago.

Sorry, Cloud, Jon is just very easily intimidated. Sometimes it's better not to openly present limbs that are at the same time being advertised to knock him out if needed.

"...I--" He starts, trying very hard not to lean away even further - And failing spectacularly before giving a hardly convincing answer "--I will keep it in mind?"

Of course he won't be calling anyone in such an event. Chances are that Jon won't even notice until it's too late anyway. And most of his victims remain oblivious for a prolonged time as well.

His hand is away now, try to relax a little Jon. Cloud could come up with a different way to knock him out by then. If it even happens, Cloud would otherwise be curious about Jon. He'll end up watching him silently mostly out of concern. But Jon didn't seem to be a threat.

"Jon," Cloud takes a step back while keeping his attention on him. "I want you to know that I do not plan to do you any kind of harm. My intention is to make sure you don't do something you might regret." As much as he's trained to take down threats he was also trained to protect people too. His own friends back home could be seen as threats to be taken out.

He looks down towards the ground. "This is your space and you should feel comfortable in it." He's not the best at socializing Jon may have already noticed that.

As much as Cloud tries to reassure the Archivist, Jon primarily feels a little threatened and that worries him. This man, trained to fight, take down and kill monsters is someone set to protect those in need. And there is no way for Jon to guarantee he won't be turning into a thread at some point. Which means he might at some point find himself facing actual heroes like Cloud here.

Or Billy.

Or Tommy.

Or... There are definitely too many and that list is starting to get intimidating.

It's the last bit Cloud says, however, that really earns Jon's frown and he can't help but look around this mental version of his office before he finds himself asking, very cautiously: "Would you feel comfortable in a place like this...?"

Cloud looks at Jon intently on that question. His choice of words never seem to be helpful in these matters. He's already focused more on Jon versus the rest of the room that had been making him nervous. The eyes always watchful but he's grown a bit used to them knowing why they are there.

"I'm comfortable since I'm putting all of my focus solely on you." He admits that it's not exactly easy since Cloud's an idiot at times. But it's the truth he can came to. If he can make himself nervous to not be motion sickness. He can put forth his attention and focus on someone and ignore the rest of the room.

"If I had to be in here as you are, I'd focus on the thing that means the most to me. Since it would be a comfort and try to ignore everything else. I still have fears on my own. Death and not finding a cure. I could die here on this planet. No where to me really is comfortable. I have to make it so."

Jon looks at Cloud, then just sighs ad drops his gaze "I can't... I can't simply ignore the things that make me nervous. Or uncomfortable. Or afraid. They are all here for a reason. I... I am the Archivist after all." - Whatever precisely that means.

"Most of what you find in here has tried to kill me. Ignoring these things... Feels like a potentially fatal thing to do." No. Jon isn't comfortable in his own mind. Not any longer. Because even here it is filled with everything dreadful, and a lot of it still remains hidden out of sight.

Jon beats him at this game. Cloud doesn't want to make an argument. He does let it drop seeing how it makes the other. The silence comes in as his own eyes soften with sadness over Jon.

"They're your memories and you may not be able to out run them. I hide a lot of myself too. You don't know my own past, what I run from, what could have killed me." He looks at the other. "I could have been controlled to being a monster. My own nightmare is a part of me and will always be. I will keep facing it. But I do need to keep living a life. I have people that depend on me. I can't simply forget about them."

Sephiroth may only be a memory at this point but he still has his cells running through him too.

"I'm here now. You wanted to know what I could provide. It's protection, I will even protect you."

Protection.

Well. Why not. Jon gives a short nod.

"It's... Appreciated." He pauses. Briefly. "And I won't claim I'm not curious about those nightmares, but I will not be asking." The risk of accidentally adding to them is too high for his liking. Much to high.

Cloud gives a small nod back to Jon.

"I won't bring it back up." He can be sure to leave that topic where it ended. Cloud saw a mug earlier. "What's with the tea mug? And what kind of tea is it?"

"Tea mug?" Jon counters, surprised by the question, yet easily finding the nearest of these, blinking twice in mild confusion.

"What of it? It's... It's a mug? And-" He shrugs, picks it up and peers at the little tea left inside. "Can't quite tell, to be honest. Probably a black tea? That's what Martin used to make the most often."

Cloud gives another nod to Jon. Yeah, it's a bit strange to go for a tea mug.

However, there's no fear to follow after the question. That makes him smile a little bit while listening to the Archivist talk about someone from his world. Cloud tilts his head to the side. "Whose Martin? Is he a friend or colleague? Assistant?" Since he makes the tea and Jon may have an assistant for all the work he does. Someone must help with the cataloguing.

“He’s one of my assistants, yes.” Jon confirms with a nod. A nod that is followed by a somewhat guilty smile while Jon sets the mug back down and glances over to the pile of fire extinguishers.

“And I will admit that he is the one of my assistants I haven’t been entirely fair to when I took over the position as Head Archivist. But... He has proven himself. In various ways.” In a way, Jon misses Martin. But would he want him to be kidnapped to Temba?

"One? How many assistants do you have?" Cloud tilts his head at that. Was that supposed to mean something else?

"Do you mean that you were testing him?" He wanted to know what he meant by not being entirely fair to. Cloud knew all about proving themselves. He's going to have to keep doing it here too. Cloud wouldn't know if he wanted more of his friends to be kidnapped here. As much as he would get to see them, he wouldn't know what would be good to say to them. If certain things should stay in certain time periods. It didn't really matter if they ended up back in the Calibrations. Reeve's been here longer than him already.

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject