[Posted Anonymously] sorry, boys be boys

[thepurpleone]

[The footage is grainy, purposely put through a filter to (badly) mimic the quality of a VHS playback. There's random snippets. B-footage if you will, featuring Stu and Billy just going about random places, pieced together as bad cuts.

"People would kill to have access to some actual entertainment," Billy's voice plays over the visuals, Stu's giggles layered in the background.

"Yeah, that's why I'd do it -- Quick, get a knife!"  comes Stu's eager exclamation.

There's a canned scream as the footage flickers out from an unnecessary zoom-in of Stu's face and goes to an abrupt black screen.

"Careful --you might get hurt in here," Billy's voice echoes warningly.

There's a shot of the smoldering remains of the building in the Green quadrant. For added insult it is inexplicably filmed narrow with two black bars framing the space that isn't a playback.

"Do you like -- Stupid -- movies?"

Stu's words round things off, a very obvious cut and paste edit job on the dialogue for how different 'stupid' sounds from the rest.

The video ends with a staticky screen.]

Comments

[audio]

[target_audience]

Yeah, I miss him, you don't have to be a dick about it. Geez.

[audio] UN: Conan Edogawa

[mysteryfreak]

Ne, what did you need the knife for?

[ Anonymous video being posted is, in his books suspicious. The question is, of course is this like an anonymous tip off or someone trying to frame someone else? ]

[target_audience]

I dunno, little dude, maybe it was dinner time. Is that really what you're worried about? Some guy is taunting me about kidnapping my friend with stalker videos. You see that guy in the video? That's Billy. He's the coolest, that's my guy, man. [Maybe he sounds a little weepy.]

[mysteryfreak]

I'm a detective. [ He says easily. ] So I want to know all the facts, even if they seem insignificant- 'The Devil is in details,' as Holmes says.

When was the last time you saw your friend?

[target_audience]

My house doesn't talk.

Days and...days ago. Before they said we could go back to the planet. I thought he was a goner, man and--[sniff, sniff, definitely crying now]--he probably is and this is just a sick joke. I'm probably next.

[mysteryfreak]

[ He's not going to dignify that first part with a response. He's also, as it turns out, not the most emotionally aware. ]

Does anything stand out about the day you saw him last? Was he acting different? Did he have any enemies?

[target_audience]

He was really sad because his arm didn't work. It's new. It's hard to tell when he's sad because he's really, you know, but I can tell--don't tell him I told you, I just miss him, man.

He gets along with everyone, he's really cool. Everyone wants to be his friend. You should've seen him back home, the chicks were all over him. I don't know anybody with enemies.

action;

[faceguy]

[Well, it's up now. Leo watches it on his own tablet, then looks up at Donnie.]

Not bad, Spielberg.

[thepurpleone]

Thank you, thank you. Although it was almost painful piecing that together, but I guess that was a sign I was doing it right.

[faceguy]

If Mikey were here, he'd say that's suffering for your art.

[thepurpleone]

Is that what this is?

[He tries not to look too bummed about the reminder of the lack of little brother present, but he is still pretty proud of this thing, so that helps level it out.]

Well, I don't know what it'll accomplish but hey, it made me feel better so that's something!

[faceguy]

Heh. I feel a little better, too.

[Leo actually still feels really sore about the whole thing, and he isn't sure it will get anyone to do anything. But he doesn't want to worry Donnie again.]

[thepurpleone]

[It may not actually do anything, but Donnie still feels something for the deed. It was a slight on an artistic level that he's sure Mikey would be proud of, poking fun at the movie-obsessive murderers while pointing fingers, dangling hints of information that suggest there's more. He might be half-hoping that it prompts a direct confrontation, but those two seem to love playing up being the victims.]

Won't win me any Academy nominations for Best Picture but at least I might get one for Special Effects.

[He doesn't completely believe Leo there, but he'd like to think this dumb thing's kind of helped. Otherwise he really can't blame his brother for feeling the way he does, not when things haven't been settled, not when it doesn't seem like anything's been done.

A sigh slips from him as he slouches in his seat.]

[faceguy]

[Donnie slouches, so Leo leans over the back of the chair, resting his hands on Donnie’s shoulders.]

I still wanna punch ‘em, though. [He admits this airily. At least he’s back down from killing them.]

[text]

[work_wife]

What the fuck? If this is a movie then it's really shit. And I worked in a video store. I know shit movies. What the hell?

text; anon

[faceguy]

aww don’t be like that
they worked hard on it!

[work_wife]

So? There's things that are needed in the construction of even a bomb classic. This just feels petty.

Also, what's it even supposed to be implying?

[faceguy]

it’s made of security cam footage of two guys being shady

[work_wife]

Yeah, that's fine. Present it like a documentary, not a shitty attempt at a movie. Geez.

[faceguy]

everyone’s a critic around here

[anon]

[thepurpleone]

You've missed the point entirely I see.

[work_wife]

Oh no, I get the point. I'm saying you're not doing good at conveying it. All forms of visual media have language to them, even attack ads.

But seriously, this is creepy. Like, one of these guys saved my life.

[thepurpleone]

The whole point is that it's supposed to be a mockery of a bad movie.

Also, those two are liars and dangerous.

[work_wife]

Again, saved my life. Just about carried me to the hospital.

[thepurpleone]

And you don't think that's convenient that he just happened to find you there?