revivalproject | Do you wanna feel how it feels?

Entry tags:

Do you wanna feel how it feels?

Who: Eddie Munson, Billy Hargrove, Steve Harrington
What: Max is gone...
Where: The hotel
When: Early in the month, soon after Max disappears
Warnings: Violence, TBD

Sitting in Max's room, Eddie sighs, cursing and scanning over the list again. As though her name will have reappeared since he last rechecked. He wanted to see for himself before bringing it up to Steve, but now that he's looked around and proven to himself she isn't here...he feel overwhelmed. There's grief, there's fear- and god- how the hell is he supposed to tell Steve? And what about Hargrove? Worrying about the others at least lets him distance himself for the time being.

He picks up the tape player he'd stolen for her, flicking it open and seeing his custom mix tape still inside. Before he can get too emotional about that he shuts it and shoves it into his pocket.

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"I DIDN'T DO IT!!" He all but screams back at Steve from where he's still on the floor. At least Billy's gotten some of his voice back. There's a vague thought, wondering if anyone else lives in the hotel, that's gone the moment is crosses his mind. "I DIDN'T SEND HER AWAY!"

He coughs, finally rolling onto his back. The motion rucks up his shirt enough to show the bandages he's still sporting to try and cushion some of the aches and pains. Billy's tanned face is wet, gaze distant and not looking towards either of them.

"I've been leaving Munson alone but I came here looking for Max and saw him pocketing her stuff. And she's gone." Another series of coughs, a hand going over where Steve punched him. There's already bruising starting to show on his face as blood slides down his upper lip and cheek, into his hair.

"Hey," Steve grumbles to the 'hopped up jocks' comment. Still, he is too amped to really do anything about it. Some of that dissipates as Billy's shirt moves and the bandages are revealed. Right where he punched. Steve winces a little but can't bring himself to regret it. Instead he just stays silent and between the fallen bully and his friend.

"Eddie wouldn't be stealing from her," he latches onto the only thing he can focus on which is defending Eddie from the accusation. The adrenaline is fading though and slowly he comes down. His head is still aching and a migraine is probably in the near future. His fists don't unclench but they do find their way to his hips. He sighs as Billy coughs, hating that he feels a little guilty.

"Dude, are you gonna die from that punch?"

If they were alone Eddie might apologize for the remark with a kiss, and he will- later. But for now he can only spare a look and a reassuring grip at his shoulder.

"...I just wanted something to remember her by, I wasn't thinking of it like stealing-" he mutters, and he sighs, nodding towards the bed and encouraging Steve to sit.

"Try not to kill each for 5 seconds," he says, disappearing into Max's bathroom. He returns to press a cool cloth to Steve's head, manually ensuring he holds in there before crossing to offer a warmer one to Hargrove to help clean up the blood. "Everyone here clearly cares about Max. So for her sake, we shouldn't kick the shit out of each other until one of us actually deserves it first, okay?"

"No, 'm not gonna die. Just fucking hurts. Not finished healing up from the Mind Flayer and the doctors here patching me up." At least he stays on the floor where he's clearly less of a threat to the other two. He glares towards Steve, but the look doesn't hold for long and he groans at the throb in his head.

"Fuck."

At the press of the warm cloth, Billy's hand fumbles up to it in an attempt to clean up the warm trail of blood himself. "It looked like you were stealing when I came in here." The gaze shifts to Eddie, avoiding Steve.

"Shouldn't have pushed you against the wall," he mumbles out. As close as he's going to get to apologizing at all right now. He doesn't issue one to Steve - the former King of Hawkins threw that first punch.

The non-apology apology takes the wind out of Steve's sails. Finally he walks to the bed and sits down, holding the cold towel against his head and watching Billy closely. "Shouldn't have tossed him to the ground either, if we're pointing out shitty acts..." He more grumbles that than anything else. He looks at Billy and his wrapped middle and frowns.

"I wouldn't have punched there if I knew you were still...whatever." It's not an apology but it's all Billy will get. Steve looks over at Eddie, gaze intense.

"You're okay?"

"S'fine," Eddie dismisses, almost equally uncomfortable with all that junk. And oh good. No one is punching each other any more. Eddie finally lets out a breath, releasing some of that anxious tension, and he moves to sit with Steve.

"I'm fine, Mr. Concussion," he teases softly, looking into his eyes and frowning.

"Should I call a doctor in for you guys?"

"Clocked me good, too." There's a breathy laughter, almost manic again and he turns to look at Steve with a pained smirk. "Too bad I didn't have a plate. Might've won this one." He wouldn't have. The mistake in keeping Steve in close quarters was the literal downfall this time around.

His head turns to look back up at the ceiling, then towards the wall.

"...'m fine. I'll sleep it off." After all, it wasn't he first time he'd been hit, but not by either of the two currently in the room with him. Billy wonders if he should get off of the floor but figures Steve isn't going to let him get any closer to Eddie, even injured.

He breathes, raggedly, thinking of Max. "...I wanted her here," he whispers. "Was gonna try to be better." Keyword 'try', but Billy felt like it would be easier without Neil's presence being a threat.

"That plate was a cheap shot and you know it." Not the point and Steve rolls his eyes. Unfortunately that hurts his head something awful and he winces with a hiss before pressing the cold cloth in harder. Glancing at Eddie he offers a soft smile.

"I'll be fine. If I baby my head enough I will avoid the migraine. Probably."

The mention of Max makes him slump forward. He looks back at Billy, sympathetic even while being angry. "I don't like the idea of her being back in Hawkins. She was safe here... I was able to look out for her. I have no idea what she returned to..."

"...You two are freaks," Eddie notes, giving an exasperated shake of his head, but smiling despite himself.

"She might come back," he offers, not sure, obviously, but he's heard stories from others. "If she does you can show her how you've been trying. And she's got you back there, Steve. You're gonna keep her safe."

More things get realized and Billy understands that he really hates right where he is at the moment. Once he leaves here, he'll be alone in his grief, to try and get past Max's sudden departure like he had to learn to deal with his mother doing the same all those years ago. The two currently sitting on the bed have each other to work through it.

Billy has no one and he knows it's only himself to blame for it. He rolls onto his side, gritting his teeth tight (and wishing he had Tae's towel to bite into) as he does so. More laughter, high and tight with a hand throwing the warm cloth over his face. It doesn't help at all.

"I'm supposed to keep her safe. And I can't do that anywhere. I die doing it back in Hawkins and she's ripped away from me before I can even try to be fucking better here!" Because she's gone, the only piece of his current family that he likes, even if he's been horrid at showing it. Billy has no idea what her life is like after he passes. The laughter turns into sobs. When was the last time he had actually done anything aside from anger and arrogance?

Billy breaking into sobs is enough to stun Steve. His mouth opens in surprise and he glances over at Eddie before looking back at the blonde. What was he supposed to do right now? Billy is a bully and a menace and is dangerous. But right now he just looks sad. Sad and grieving. The humanity of such a response breaks the mental view of him being nothing but a monster.

Steve isn't about to go closer to him, but he at least relaxes his tensed muscles. It's a ceasefire at the very least.

"Dude...being "better" isn't something you can do for someone else. Trust me, I tried. Until you're doing it for you, it's just not going to stick. Maybe...maybe Max leaving will help you do that. So if she comes back, you've already done the work without her needing to help you along."

Dude... Eddie blanches a little, and instinctively looks away from the show of vulnerability, sharing that look with Steve and giving a very lost gesture, likewise not sure what to do.

"...you meant a lot to her," he offers, "You guys clearly had some...sibling issues or whatever, but, uh- she seemed real shook up about loosing you..."

Hard to be dangerous when Steve might've given him a concussion and laid him out on the floor for hitting his healing wounds. Everything hurts and he prays it's not bad enough to have to go back to the hospital. Tae might actually kill him for wrecking all the work she put into not letting him die.

He hears Eddie and Steve, but it feels distant. He feels hollow, like he had in his room so many years ago with the phone up to his ear. Billy figures Max always sort of hated him. And then the way she looked and spoke to him in the sauna room, that locked door between them. The Californian knew she didn't, not entirely.

"Yes it is. If I can be better for someone else... I can be better for everyone else, too." Which included himself. Maybe.

Edited 2023-06-09 01:58 (UTC)

"If you do it for someone else...then shit like this happens. The person leaves and now what? You don't know what to fucking do. Or, worse, you let someone else make you worse. You do it for you or you don't do it at all. Believe it from someone who did that shit himself."

He looks at Eddie, sympathizing with how awkward he must be feeling. He lets out a soft exhale and extends an olive branch.

"Everyone in this room loves Max. And we all fucking hate that she's gone. So... I guess let's not disappoint her by killing each other. She loves us, too. All of us."

It feels strange to be included in Steve's assurance that Max loved them all. Hargrove was family. Obviously. And Steve's as good as a brother to her. But he's just...her drug dealing neighbor. He swallows a bit thickly and rubs at his nose, giving an uncomfortable nod as his emotions threaten to overwhelm him.

"She'd kick our asses. And Red scares me more than you," he ads with a small grin.

"Says the guy that threatened to kill me if the assholes that keep us here send Eddie home," he mutters aloud. Billy could be Steve's scapegoat here in the city, he presumes. He wonders if Steve would've kept going if Eddie hadn't been here. Would he have acted like Billy and kept going until the blond passed out?

Just the talk of Max actually... loving the three of them is enough to bring up silent tears again. Just knowing she did love him despite everything made things feel a little lighter. Billy doesn't move from his spot on the floor. Everything aches too much to do that right now.

"I'm going to be better, and that started with being a better step-brother to her. Not just being good in general for her." It was supposed to be that start, which was always the hardest part. Now it was ripped away from him and he'd have to find a different starting point.

Steve glances at Billy when he says that but doesn't quite retract his threat. If Eddie leaves... If he is taken... Steve is just not sure what he'll do in that situation. But it won't be anything good.

"How about you start with keeping your hands off Eddie, huh?" He can't help but snap a little. He'd seen Eddie get thrown to the floor and part of him still wanted to punch Billy a few times for it. "He didn't do shit to deserve it."

"I mean- we're all talking about her like she's dead. She's back home. She's good," Eddie says softly, "The three of us are tough enough to keep it together..."

"I was totally about to turn things around," he dismisses with a small smirk, trying to keep things light, but he does lean covertly into Steve's space, sharing a grateful look.

"Like I said, I thought he was stealing. That's what it fucking looked like when I walked in." Billy wasn't moving on that because it was a fact. Like the fact that he doesn't know how to deal with the waves of anger when they rush through him like a storm.

Billy stiffens on the floor, still not really moving to sit up or move. It feels like it would provoke Steve and he's just... he can't... the wind got knocked out of his sails with that punch to the gut, with the fact that Max was gone. "She's not dead," he spits out, sliding his gaze to glare at Eddie through the strands of curls.

"...As long as she's safe." Because he doesn't know. Of course he wouldn't. Billy knows that he's dead when she's from.

He finally decides to chance it and works his way up into sitting. Billy's face is wet, both from the tears and that stream of blood that's finally stopped from his nose. The bruising on his face is bright, a stark contrast to his California sun-kissed skin.

"...I want her walkman." That tone gives no room for argument, or for compromise.

"Well maybe ask a fucking question before throwing a punch." Rich considering what he'd just done a second before, but still. He'd been responding to the violence against Eddie. It's different, shut up.

At both Eddie and Billy being so sure that Max is safe, Steve feels guilt drop heavy on his shoulders. He looks away, down at the floor so he doesn't give anything away with his expression. Neither of them need to know that Max could have returned to a coma or worse. He can hold that information to himself.

"Give him the walkman, man," Steve surrenders, stroking Eddie's arm as reassurance. "If that ends this shit, then good." He looks Billy over and sighs. "You might also wanna see the hospital people or whatever. I didn't mean to hit you in like some wound or whatever. Don't die just because you're too macho to get a bandaid."

"He did, technically," Eddie notes. Not that Eddie thinks any response would've got him out of taking a bit of a beating.

Eddie'd obviously wanted it for himself, and he frowns faintly, but considers their relationship and nods. Not that Hargrove's asking exactly. That's her brother though, he should get first dibs. "It's all one song," he warns, just so he's not surprised by that fact later.

"I did," he agrees with a hollow laugh. "I asked what he was doing, and where Max was." How ironic that Steve was telling Billy to ask first and then hit later seeing as that's exactly what he had done when he came in to sock Billy in the face.

He snorts at the remark to go to the hospital. "I'll be fine. I got patched up well enough, but it's all fucking tender. You try getting skewered by the Mind Flayer bullshit and see if you feel fine after a couple of weeks." Billy removes his shirt and starts checking the multiple bandages. No evidence of blood, but the skin where Steve punched him is an angry red from irritation. "I'm not gonna die like a little bitch from some punching."

He'll just complain like one for a little bit.

Satisfied that everything's still in place, the shirt gets pulled back on and settled. He relaxes a little, eyes set on the wall before sliding to the walkman on the bed. A hand goes out and makes a 'gimmie' motion for it. He is not getting up and risking Steve taking advantage of him being wounded for another fight.

Steve rolls his eyes and grabs the walkman to put it into Billy's open hand. His wounds don't look like he's gonna die so that at least is a comfort. Steve doesn't like him but didn't want to seriously injure him.

"There. Now just. Hands off, alright? Counts for all of us. No fighting or shoving around or shit like that. This is a truce for Max. Deal?" He looks at Billy, clearly trusting him the least, but also nudges Eddie with his elbow.

"Today was the last of it. We're all gonna be good."

"The Mind Flayer's the big one, right?" Eddie asks, trying to remember all the different Vecna hivemind creatures he's heard of but not seen. "Is it the one made of dust?"

He flinches a little at Steve's nudge, "Hey, I'm the only one who hasn't thrown punches today. I'm all ready the good one. Fine, deal. Truce."

"The one in the mall," is added, to help Eddie. Billy doesn't know about the dust part though. He knows how it invaded his mind, made him do things that are worse than anything the blond has ever done.

He takes the walkman and sets it in his lap for the moment while Steve calls for a truce between them. The instinct in him wants Billy to snap and say no, but he shouldn't. There wasn't anyone to back him up here, not like he had in Hawkins before he got dragged into the Steelworks building.

He holds out his right hand towards Steve. Billy wants to at least shake on it. "I... will try." Because he does want to be better, for as long as he's allowed to live here before being sent home. But there's a lot to undo, but he wants to at least try.

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