revivalproject | [Video] Gotta whine fast

[What's up, kids. Hope you like THE SKY, because this video opens just starin' right up at it. Not for too long, though, as the guy responsible for this dumb video realizes pretty quickly that he's holding his device backwards and flips it around, revealing a weird blue critter that appears to be laying on his back on a roof. Why??? I mean why not. Y'all are in the mood for a bitchy teenager, right? Well too bad.]

Okay, I'm about to make a less than great first impression to anyone I haven't already bumped into yet, but sometimes you just gotta complain into the void, y'know? Here goes;

[he pauses to clear his throat, and then commences the bitching]

So, I can deal with being kidnapped by aliens, right? That's fine, I guess. Happens to the best of us, keeps life interesting, whatever. I can roll with the unexpected. I can mostly tolerate being tossed onto a dumpy, abandoned planet with extremely limited travel options. I mean, that's less fine than being kidnapped by aliens, but at least this tiny chunk of space we have doesn't have any speed limits. Fine, I can cope.

But, the thing about this that's completely unacceptable is that apparently, I missed a big fight with a bunch of monsters? Seriously!? I've seen movies, aliens aren't supposed to abduct you after the danger's passed. Where's the fun in that? Do our alien overlords accept feedback? I wanna file a complaint!

[Maybe this guy's priorities are just a little skewed. It's fine. He sighs, a little overly dramatic (because missing a monster fight is absolute bullshit), the video jostling a bit as he shrugs.]

Ah well. Anyway! The name's Sonic. I guess if you guys need help with cleanup after all that, hit me up? I have nothing but free time on my hands right now, and I'm already bored out of my mind.

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Heh. It's not so much that I look forward to chaos and mayhem so much as I like the challenge of reigning them in and showing them who's boss.

[Radley smirks a bit.]

Okay, that's a little more understandable. That can be pretty fun. I usually prefer a war of wits than muscle, though.

Eh, sometimes even your nastiest brawls require some quick, strategic thinking. It's like solving a puzzle sometimes, only with your fists.

Good point. Yeah, it can be like that. My favorite kind of physical attack is a judo flip. Somehow bullies never expect to suddenly be hoisted over my shoulder and thrown to the ground. But judo doesn't really work on fifty-foot monsters.

See, that's when you go for the legs. The bigger they are, the harder they fall.

My machete couldn't do much, but yeah, if I'd found a better weapon, I think I could've been a contender there.

What does the weapon situation look like around here? If we're gonna be dealing with giant monsters and stuff, we're gonna need more than machetes.

It seems like the best weapons have been going to people who have some of the Datapoints. Me, I'm not a big fan of having stuff downloaded into my brain.

Ugh, yeah. Can't say I'm a huge fan of it myself. If it means having a better shot at helping out, though, I'll probably chance it.

Yeah, I may end up feeling like I have to break and do it too. But I hope not.

I give myself a week. Like, I kind of don't want to, but I know me. I have a bit of a bad habit of being impulsive.

[a BIT???]

... A week would be impulsive?

When it comes to letting weird technology into my brain? Absolutely. Now, if it was trying to jump over a canyon, or soloing a fifty foot robot or something, that I would do in a heartbeat.

[Radley shakes his head in amusement.]

I would be waiting on all those things. But I guess if I had the ability to leap tall buildings in a single bound, I'd have a lot of fun with that too.

I haven't broken my legs yet, I'd say that's a sign that I should just keep doing what I do best.

[That being really, really stupid stuff.]

[Well, that sure sounds like arrogant teenager talk. And Radley knows how virtually impossible it is to argue with arrogant teens. He's learned to pretty much just humor them ... while keeping an eye on them. But he still feels the need to make one other comment.]

You don't think your luck will run out someday if you keep pushing it?

Heh. I would say that luck has nothing to do with it, and that my constant string of victories is all based entirely on skill, but you're not wrong. Things always have the potential to get out of hand, but I like to think that I'm prepared to deal with it if it does.

Well, at least you recognize things can go South.

[Although that hadn't saved him back home. Hopefully Sonic really can deal with whatever problems crop up here....]

So what kinds of things have you dealt with back home?

Oh yeah. I'm not a complete disaster.

[Oh boy, where to even start. Sonic sighs and rubs at his forehead.]

If I covered everything, we'd be here all day. Most of it boils down to this one mustachioed super-genius deciding to use his giant brain for evil and trying to take over the world every five minutes. His thing is robots, and he's built a bajillion of them. Tiny ones, huge ones, some modeled after me, which is maybe a little creepy. Nine times out of ten, the problems I have to solve are because of this guy.

[Well, that fits with the Sonic lore Radley knows from home. He still hasn't revealed he knows of Sonic from there and isn't sure whether to or not. That might also be creepy.]

He sounds like a big pain, to say the least.

[As long as Rad's not building Sonic themed robots, the creepy level probably won't be too high]

He is the single most frustrating person I have ever met.

...And he's back home while I'm stuck here. Ugh. I swear, if he takes over the world while I'm out of commission again, I'm going to lose my mind.

[Radley smirks in sympathy.]

Well, I'm pretty sure we get sent back to the same point we left, so hopefully that won't be happening.

Wait, really? Huh, I guess there's nothing to worry about, then.

[It's not going to stop him from worrying, but eh. It's probably fine.]

Yeah, that's what some have said who've gone home and come back again, at least.

Wait a minute, I thought we couldn't leave until we fixed this crap for the aliens! How are people going home?

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