Video

[hashtagparkerluck]

[ Here is a face that no one's seen in quite some time. From the look of things he's up on a roof somewhere but no one worry about that. ]

So! I was gonna have a whole melt down about the fact it was like almost August or August adjacent as far as I knew but now it's not?? I was about to be sixteen and then It's suddenly almost a whole year later? Am I still fifteen and still about to be sixteen or am I sixteen and about to be seventeen? I genuinely don't know how old I am now.

But!

Then I got attacked by this thing.

[ He pans the camera over to the Bearger. ]

And it seemed like a much more pressing concern. Not super friendly. Didn't appreciate getting webbed in the face so I'm just gonna.. chill here and contemplate my existential crisis I guess.

...

Oh! I'm Peter, by the way!

Comments

[Video]

[out_of_order]

Know what? I totally get that. I was here for...what, several years? And then I got dropped back where I was from and came back so I...guess I'm younger than I was when I left Temba? But still remember things.

...also, yeah. That. You okay? We...should definitely deal with that problem.

[A bit of an awkward pause.]

Welcome back Peter. Or...as welcome as one can be here I guess.

[Video]

[hashtagparkerluck]

Hey thanks! [ He's just as cheerful as ever. ] I probably owe so many people an apology for being gone so long...

Anyway! I could probably lure it somewhere and trap it with webbing but I've got...

[ He checks the level on his webfluid. ] Not a lot left.

[Video]

[out_of_order]

Not your fault. Not like we get a choice coming or going, and I don't think many really would wish people to be stuck here with them. But we miss people all the same.

[He lifts his head.]

Those guys look pretty big. I don't think traps will work that great. Save your webbing, there might be better ways to put it to use.

[Video]

[hashtagparkerluck]

Unfortunately, that doesn't really stop me from feeling guilty about it.

[ but never mind that! He's got a monster to... examine? Come up with a plan of attack? He's got something to do. ]

Yeah, what I have left is it until I can figure out how to make more-I can probably get most of the stuff from the replicator but uh.. some of it I'm gonna have to find substitutes for.

[ There's a roar in the background and Peter waves it off like it's someone being too loud in the background. ]

Anyways, Guess I'll hang out here with Barry and keep his attention for a bit.

[Video]

[out_of_order]

Be careful. I'll come join you soon as I can.

Audio Only

[doubled_speed]

Hey Spidey! Welcome back or some shit. Try not to think too hard about age, but base it on home first, here second is my usual rule.

Also, yeah, this little asshole is a BIT too close to my diner. Gotta deal with that.

[Don't mind the blur of green that might be visible near the feet of the thing, Peter. It's Nothing Important.]

Audio Only

[hashtagparkerluck]

Yeah, good to be back?? Idk man. Yesterday it was summer.

Anyways, you need help down there? [ He knows that's you, Tommy! ]

[doubled_speed]

Give it a bit and it will be summer again.

[Of course he needs help Peter. He's a SPEEDSTER. His main combat technique is going faster than sound and running through things and no one wants that.]

I mean, you're a hero. Suit up, Young Avengers Assemble or some shit. I don't know. I don't get to shout it.

[hashtagparkerluck]

Cool but I don't have a suit.

[ not that that's gonna stop him. Tommy will hear the soft 'Thwip' from Peter's web shooters as he gets ready to swing into combat. He lands on a building nearby, sticking to the wall as one does. ]

Hey Buddy! Can I help you?

[doubled_speed]

Yeah, sorry about that. Can't help there.

[He isn't surprised that Spidey would show up and then just stick on a wall to talk rather than join him in fighting. Which Tommy was doing by trying to punch the thing's legs.]

That'd be helpful.

[beyourzoomer]

[Well of course there's more than one kind of monster. Why wouldn't there be?]

Are you safe where you are? Wherever you are?

[hashtagparkerluck]

Uh.. yeah, I don't think it can climb so, I'm good.

...

Probably

[ You know, up until he jumps back down to help Tommy. ]

[beyourzoomer]

[She's definitely not convinced the thing is incapable of climbing. Or jumping. Or -- well it doesn't look like it has wings, so it probably can't fly but she's learned to expect the worst.]

It looks like a cross between like, a badger and...something a lot bigger.

[hashtagparkerluck]

[ Well, if it does try to climb Peter can either change rooves or figure something else out. ]

Bear, maybe? A Bear-Ger, if you will. I call him Barry.

[beyourzoomer]

Giant Bear-Ger.

...you named him?

[Video]

[small_compromise]

Peter! You're back!

...I think you're...however old you were before you returned?

[Video]

[hashtagparkerluck]

Yup! And I gotta say, not a fan of the rampaging monster as an alarm clock.

Also, I guess that makes me fifteen still. Will I ever get to be sixteen?

[Video]

[small_compromise]

Not the best welcome. I don't know where they came from. It didn't hurt you did it?

[Still, she can't help but smile a little.]

I'll be fifteen here around mid-summer. Dustin helped calculate it for me. Do you know how long it is until you're supposed to turn sixteen if you were still back home?

[Video]

[hashtagparkerluck]

Nah, I got away in time. It's just real rude to wake someone up like that. Even if they are sleeping by the fountain.

[ He shrugs is off and then focuses on her question. ]

Well, Let's see.. it was October back home so like.. ten months? Maybe nine?

[Video]

[small_compromise]

Glad to hear it. That does sound like a bad problem for any other people that might arrive though.

Hmm... I'm not sure how months work here, but I'll see if I can figure it out. I know how to make cake now!

[video]

[the_tailor]

Hi, fellow person who can't figure out exactly how old they are 'cause of weird time and universe shenanagins due to popping in and out of existence in this universe! It's definitely a super weirdly specific club but I guess that makes us more special than, I dunno, a book club or a knitting club. Maybe we can make t-shirts.

And, uh, yeah. That thing. I'm not sure what's even going on with these things. Some of them are kind of...ugly cute but I'm definitely not going to try petting them.

[video]

[hashtagparkerluck]

[ Peter gives a shrug. ]

I mean.. it's not the saddest club I've ever been a part of. And I could do with a new t-shirt.

and oh yeah, definitely don't do that. One hundo percent gonna take your face off.

[the_tailor]

Haven't found one of those t-shirt printing machines here yet, but honestly, who knows what else is laying around? I still get surprised even after all this time.

Oof. Yep, nooooooooope. This face is far too pretty to risk getting damaged.

[hashtagparkerluck]

Maybe we'll get lucky. Have you ever heard of this really old band, um.. Blink 182? That do this song called 'what's my age again' we should put that on the shirts.

[the_tailor]

[There's a pause as Lance thinks, tapping his chin.]

Uh... Hmmm. Might be a little before my time, but hey, I can dig the phrase.