my tears are always frozen | calibration

[theladyofwinterfell]

WHO: Sansa Stark
WHERE: tunnels
WHAT: Calibrations
WHEN: 3 June - 10 June
WARNINGS: Sansa's memories include sexual assault and torture. If you do not wish to play that, do not choose the wedding gown prompt. The others are free from this.



Sansa knows of calibrations. She'd hoped to never experience the horror of her mind being on display for others but here she is again, stripped bare to be seen once more. She's terrified of it. There are those who know her darkest secrets, the ones she tries to keep buried, but more and more each day she meets people who don't know. People who might pity her if they knew. People who would see her as less because they know what she is and that she's a ghost of a woman sometimes.

There's a wedding gown split in two and marred by bright, crimson blood. There's a hunting knife that seems too modern for this sitting room of stone and glass. There's a pair of silken slippers, chewed a bit on the heels. There's a drawing of a girl and a wolf half-finished, as if the artist were pulled away by something else and hadn't had the time to return.

As she walks through her mind once again, she takes in these differences. There's a carved wooden throne with the direwolves of House Stark, a silver crown laying in the seat. There's a scroll undone, the words just enough to make out. The final thing in this room of note is golden ring with a lion's head, a ring she's not had in years. She wishes she had it now.

Comments

[theladyofwinterfell]

"That's my brother. He just wants to protect friends and family," Sansa says. "He has no desire for ambition or greatness. It's sort of good, in a way. Too many men have ambition after winning a war but no idea how to lead. Winning is easy. Governing is hard, I'm afraid."

Sansa likes to think she's good at it but good is in the eye of the beholder.

"You're a good man, though, to want to protect others. It's hard to put that talent toward shielding others and not just yourself."

[backoff]

"I try to make the attempt to and believed for a time that I was no good at doing such a thing." Cloud had to be pushed into doing something then feeling hard on himself about having Geostigma. He looks over at Sansa wondering over everything she's been through. "I don't see myself leading. I started a business but I do everything besides take the phone calls." It was the arrangement.

"I know it's a choice. But when you get left with protecting the people that mean the most to you or watch them die, I'm not going to let them die."

[theladyofwinterfell]

"I protect my people through laws," Sansa says. "I ensure there is justice for my people when they need it but I temper it with mercy. If you're too firm, you lose their love. If you're too soft, you lose their respect. To be a good leader, you must have both."

Sansa smiles a bit. "I think you have the right idea of it, though. You seem as though you'd be someone that would be good at leading others even if you don't feel you are."

[backoff]

Cloud didn't really see him picking up the leadership role any time soon. He knew that he would be able to at least try to handle it. But if people didn't listen he couldn't stop them from doing what they wanted. They could have their own reasons for it.

"I'm not so sure if I would be fit enough to lead." He says this knowing that Sansa might not know the complete truth behind the statement. Cloud would end up taking risks to protect people here. Even if it meant endangering himself, but he knew that he could be endangering others with those same risks. "Do you enjoy the life you're living currently?"