Tommy Shepard (
doubled_speed) wrote in
revivalproject2025-02-16 03:43 pm
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Who Needs Sleep
WHO: Tommy Shepherd, Billy Hargrove, Open
WHERE: Temba Greenhouse, Temba Diner, Temba Area
WHAT: Searching for Billy Kaplan
WHEN: First Day back on Temba, through all of February
WARNINGS: cw: abandonment issues, possible borderline self destructive behavior (in a physical sense)
I. Wearing Out Shoe Leather | Open
WHERE: Temba Greenhouse, Temba Diner, Temba Area
WHAT: Searching for Billy Kaplan
WHEN: First Day back on Temba, through all of February
WARNINGS: cw: abandonment issues, possible borderline self destructive behavior (in a physical sense)
I. Wearing Out Shoe Leather | Open
At first he let himself believe the absence wasn't an absence so much as the worst form of hide and seek ever. It would be just like his brother to do something like that after all. To have his communication device away from him, or to be talking to the Agrii and not looking it over, or maybe just his brother being temporarily unavailable. Hell, Tommy had even gone down into the under areas of engineering to try and check the tubes there.II. Comfort In You | Closed to Billy Hargrove
And now that he was back on the surface of Temba, well, he was no longer having any damn fun with this game. Because... Because it needs to be okay.
Otherwise...
No. No, he's not going to think about the otherwise, alright? Instead there's a blur of speed throughout all of Temba. It stops here and there, like a humming bird flitting from flower to flower for food. Stops are brief, either to whip up a quick meal in the diner, or to search delicately through plants and trees and fragile ruins. All the while his voice tears through the air, calling the same series of names over and over, seeking, hoping, unable to give up.
"Billy! Billiam! Wiccan! Punk! Where are you?!"
Don't let him be alone. Please, don't... Don't let him be alone again.
He's tired. So tired. How long had it been since he'd eaten? Since he'd slept? Tommy frankly doesn't know. What he does know is that he goes to the only place that feels safe in his undeniable despair. On some level he remembers the feeling of sand on his bare feet, the result of him running enough to run his shoes to pieces. He remembers the door. Pushing it open. Moving to the bed. Collapsing onto it with a pathetic noise that he'll never admit he made.III. Burning the All Hours Oil | Open
Safe. His mind says he's safe. That Billy will be here, sooner or later. Not the one he sought. The other one. The one who will hold him and tell him he's not alone. That he won't be alone. Even if he was. Even if he had lost the other part of his soul (part of the other part of his soul), he would still have someone who cared.
So he needed this.
Who needed sleep anyway? There was this whole fucking world to explore. Things to be done. Places to clean up or restore. Plants to be tended. The plants still needed him. People still needed him for food, right? Right. Yeah.
That's why it's three in the morning and he's hand examining every plant in the cumato area, checking the budding leaves for health. Nearby a few Funfronds seem to linger, trying to get his attention with their dancing, but he ignores them. Just focuses as he moves slowly from plant to plant. From spot in the soil to spot in the soil.
HE's been here for hours. Before this he'd been in the diner and cleaned every last surface and every last utensil. Before that it had been dusting in the Civics Center. Before that catching lobsters on the beach. Before that...
God he can't even remember. Hours were blurring together, as much because of his powers as because he was losing himself. His focus, his drive. Strange to think a lot more of it had depended on one person than he was prepared for. Two people now.
But the sleepiness is not good for him, clearly. Because the second he hears someone approaching he flinches. And flinching from a speedster isn't good. Why? Because between one moment and the next he's no longer standing where he was. He's several feet back, a trowel held up before him like it was a weapon meant to defend himself. His eyes are blurry, red from crying, and definitely not entirely there. Like he's lost.
Maybe he is.
"What do you want?" he snaps when he realizes it isn't danger that's facing him.
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He didn’t know how to fix this for Tommy. Only that he could prolong whatever the inevitable was by distracting his speedster from it. Keeping those feet clean and wrapped; making sure Tommy ate something; keeping him comfortable during this. "How about we go to the greenhouse tomorrow morning and take a look? Maybe find something suitable for a substitute. Then we can go to the gym and I’ll workout shirtless for you."
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Though he groans at the idea of walking that far. Going places he worked so hard in for his brother.
"Okay. But only because I like you shirtless."
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The fork‘s prongs stab into another bit that gets offered up to Tommy. "Few more bites for me. And I know you like me shirtless - that was my first clue that something’s wrong because you haven’t tried to feel me up." Billy was still shirtless after all, but that was irrelevant in the wake of his boyfriend‘s grief.
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WHich of course was a horrible way to think of it, but he was doing so anyway.
"Rude if you're not giving me permission. And I'm tired. I'm so tired."
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The fork gets wiggled a little, in an attempt to notice entice Tommy into eating the bite. "If I didn’t want to fucking share, you wouldn’t have any of it."
He gently knocks their shoulders together. "I know you’re tired. Also you’re my boyfriend. You’re allowed to get those hands on me when you want. Especially if I’m shirtless. Feet feeling any better? Probably sore from all that running."
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"I don't have the energy for hands on," he mumbles. Or the heart. But he's not saying that.
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Billy leans over to kiss Tommy’s cheek. "And the remark that you can be hands on is like my door. It’s open for you whenever you want. It’s called boyfriend privileges." Billy finds he wants to fix this. You can’t put tape on a broken heart though, can’t see it shut to stop the bleeding. He had to let Tommy go through this and just be there to help prop him up when he could.
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He's in that mode now. Even if he knows he should really eat. He's so fucking worn out and food means nothing to him. Only reason he's eating is to appease his boyfriend.
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With that finished, he sets it out of the way on the nightstand and cups Tommy’s face in both hands. "Babe, what can I do to help you right now."
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"Be here when I wake up?"
It's whispered, scared to be rejected. Scared that even if Billy agrees, he can't live up to the promise.
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He’s already reaching down under the bed where he keeps his clothes (the worn ones in a pile under the hammock) to pull out two pairs of shorts that have extra openings for Agrii-legs.
agrii only have one set of legs
But he probably should change. It's just... everything feels like a burden right now.
"I'm not used to being this tired. This drained. But I couldn't just not look, right? I had to find him?"
He had to see with his own eyes.
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He offers the shorts with a hand. "You want me to at least gets your pants changed out for the shorts? I’ll take care of you babe, so minimal moving for my tired man."
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Billy probably hadn't.
For now he sighs and closes his eyes. That's not really going to help him here if he's honest. He has to accept something.
Has to accept help.
"Yes. Please."
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"Okay. I got you, babe. Lay back, okay?" Billy’s weight leaves the bed and he squats in front of Tommy to work at the fly of his jeans. "Not how I wanted to get your jeans off for the first time, but gotta make sure you’re on the way to being okay, even if it’s just for tonight.
Billy works the garment down and motions almost to throw it - then second guesses it, folds them, and sets them on the bed for later. Then he picks up the shorts to ease one leg in, then the other to pull them up to where the jeans‘ waist had set. "There you go. Wait just a moment."
Billy gets up and goes over to the fireplace to toss another log in. One already in it cracks in two and he grins before going back over. "That should last into the night, long enough for us to get to sleep. Want to get under the covers and let me cuddle you for a bit?"
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"Yes," he whispers once Billy's coming back from fire tending. "Please. I want to be here."
In the home another friend and his father once tried to build. That Billy had made into a home for real. He wanted to be here.
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"I know. You always have a place here, babe. Always, got that? This place is yours as much as it is mine at this point. Especially now that your pants are off." Billy pulls the blanket down and then over them before gathering his boyfriend into his arms. Uses his foot to kick Tommy's jeans to the floor with a little smirk. "Off and on the floor."
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"You could have had my pants off before," he mumbles, trying to tease. But his heart clearly isn't in it. "Just... be here when I wake. That's all I need right now."
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"Here. Barnacle for you tonight so you know I won’t leave. I promise I won’t." And if Billy could believe that his boyfriend would come back during a screaming moon night, then maybe Tommy would believe that Billy wouldn’t leave him.
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"Thank you," he says, his voice a broken whimper. But no, he didn't want that, at all. Didn't want to be weak. "Tank you."
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Instead of bringing that up, Billy makes sure the blanket is good and rubs his hand up and down Tommy's back. "I'm here. Go ahead and sleep babe. I'll be right here when you wake up."
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