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Greetings all 'He Rows'.

As you probably know, we're approaching our final days here in the Spaceport, and our rendezvous to the Agrii portal point is coming soon. I am hoping that at this point most people have managed to put together their major purchases, both personal and for either the Agrii ship, our ships, or for your spaces back in Temba or Sh'Ka.

To that end I realize that people may also have some lingering resources for trade here, and it is to that end I now reach out.

I've been spending any time not acquiring gear for the Agrii repairs on a specific pair of projects. The first is just an announcement. I bought a few small machines, a hydraulic brick press and a medium sized device for mixing concrete or mortar for joins. But that's beyond the point beyond announcing that will be available soon.

No, what I'm looking to acquire is more important than that.

I wish to repair the roads in Temba. Those holes need dealt with, and our lives could benefit from them being smoothed out over time. The ultimate goal would be to try and get them automated on the latter task of the rough roads, but the former will be hard labor once we get back. But...

I'm short. I've been working long hours to build up what trade credit I can and goods and anything else, but I'm worried I'll be short of buying what is needed before we leave. If anyone is willing to donate any remains of credits, trade goods, or even just work help before we leave, I would owe you dearly. And I would find a way to repay you.

Please, I'm already not going to be able to afford this beautiful machine that would be able to use concrete to basically PRINT buildings (you can't understand how beautiful this thing is, how customizable the software, how nuanced its ability to work in internal structure needs like water and power lines, it's beautiful), but together we might be able to fix the roads, and that's a safety matter for just about everyone.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Okay. 1) You do not 'laze' anywhere. Have you lazed a moment in your life? I don't think you even laze when you're asleep.

2) I LIKE having you at my place. You're not like, a burden or whatever. It's been actually really nice having you and York around, so don't worry about the office too fast.

3) Caffeine pills are NOT the same as coffee. I don't give a shit about replicating coffee for you. Fuck, I will grow it myself. But you are NOT taking caffeine pills.

1) Said like I didn't spend a whole month at your place after getting out of the underground and that weird interdimensional monster thing.

[To recover from an INJURY REEVE.]

2) I am glad that you enjoy it, Richie, but you deserve your privacy. You have been so kind to put me up for so long. But really it's no obligation.

3) I got through three years of reactor overhauls on coffee and caffeine pills. I don't understand what the issue you're seeing here is.

Wow. Okay. Where to start.

1. YOU HAD BROKEN BODY PARTS. HELLO?

2. You read the part where I said I like having you there, right? Did that come through okay? I think it got cut off or something because you're talking about 'obligations' like I am shining your shoes every night.

3. Dude, you really don't understand why I might see some danger with abusing stimulant drugs? Think hard.

1. Sprained. Also you jumped from parenthesis to periods.

2. We both know I'm quite capable of polishing my own shoes. Did York put you up to this? He's taken to referring to us as his dads.

3. Coffee is an addicting stimulant drug. And I know not to have too many.

A. Now I am just switching shit to piss you off because you acting like you just had a simple sprained ankle is pissing me off.

2) Okay, that is sort of cute though. And no, he's not. I am just happy to have you around. Surprise!

III] You think you do. People ALWAYS think they do. You think you have it under control. You don't need them, you just want them. You could stop if you wanted to, but you don't want to because it's not a problem. Nothing is a problem. You've absolutely got a handle on it until you DON'T. Until SUDDENLY, it's out of fucking control and you were the LAST one to realize it. THAT is how this shit works and it fucking sucks and you aren't going down that road.

RICHIE! FORMATTING!

1. It WAS just a sprained ankle. The doctor said so!

2. Ah. He's just been on a really weird kick about it recently.

3. I have a feeling there is a conversation we need to have in privacy, Richard.

Be glad I am using formatting at all.

Yeah, fine. Let's have a conversation, Reeveward.

Reeveward? Really? Reeve IS my full name. I'll start back for the ship then. Meet at my room I suppose?

Edited 2024-04-14 02:31 (UTC)

Yeah, sure. I'll meet you there.

[ He's not excited about it, but it is probably necessary. And, honestly, if he can get Reeve to think twice about the pills for himself then it might just be worth the discomfort for him.

Still, he looks a particular brand of 'unhappy' as he gets to the door.]

[Yes, he does look rather unhappy. Reeve, meanwhile, has full businessman vibe going on. His best suit, a lovely tie, his shoes fully shined. He looks like he's just come out of a serious meeting.

Mini rushes past Reeve once they get in sight of Richie, gets to Richie's side, then stops and turns around to stand next to Richie, arms crossed over his little chest. Clearly Reeve is, yet again, going to get teamed up against.]

Shall we go inside first?

[ Richie gives Mini a smile and a short hug around the shoulders. It's nice to have support even if, with time, he is thinking he might have been projecting a little bit here. Just a smidge. ]

Yeah. After you.

[ He's quiet as they go inside and then then lets out a soft sigh once they're alone. With Mini. ]

So. I maybe...uh. Should start with some background you maybe don't have. Well...[ Wait. Did Reeve even HAVE illicit drugs in his world?] Huh. Did you guys have cocaine? Meth? Stuff like that?

[Mini's happy to unite with just about anyone against Reeve's stubbornness. And this was one battle he can't win at given Reeve's ability to override his opinions.

For now Reeve sighs and heads in, and once they're inside he sits down on the edge of his bed.]

I don't know what cocaine or meth is, but it seems likely, with what you were saying, that you have a history with abuse of stimulant class drugs.

[ Well. That's a way to get around to it. Trust Reeve to talk about it like falling stock prices. Richie paces a little instead of sitting too. ]

Yeah. Yeah, I wa- am an addict. I used drugs for years when I got famous. Rough shit. It started really casual, just a way to relax and enjoy a party. And then it just...[ He waved a hand to encompass years of brutal addiction. It's a complicated gesture. ]

I recovered. Took a long time but I...I've been clean. But it's always sort of there...

[How else is he supposed to handle it? This is a serious conversation and dancing around it won't help either of them.]

Would it help for me to keep anything I get far away from you? I don't want to be a stress on your sobriety, Richie.

[ He shakes his head. ]

No. No, that's. That's not it, man. [ He finally stops, standing in front of Reeve.]

You already drink more coffee than a person should. Now you're moving onto pills? I just... Caffeine is a drug, man. And I don't...I don't love you getting a better way to avoid sleep and have this shit in your body...

[Oh Richie. Reeve wants to sigh and dismiss the concerns. But he can respect them.]

I am sorry I'm causing you distress. That is not the intention. I am aware of the addictive properties, but there is so much that needs done.

[ Richie finally sits next to Reeve. His hands go to the sides of his face, gently holding it. ]

There's always gonna be so much that needs to be done. You aren't taking these until some big project gets done. There is no end point here, babe. And sooner or later, it's not gonna be enough anymore, just like apparently coffee isn't enough now.

[Okay, that's... a lot of intimacy from a touch between them, one had outside of... certain times.]

Coffee is perfectly fine. It's just that it is less efficient to replicate, and to make.

[He really looks like he means it too.]

[ Richie doesn't look convinced but he nods all the same. ]

Can that be my problem? I don't use the replicator for anything else at this point and I don't mind making it and bringing it out to you, even if you're not here. And I am sure Mini would help in a pinch.

[ He chews his lip a moment. ]

I mean...and we could also talk maybe about having a little less? I care about you, Reeve, and I hate watching you burn yourself at both ends. The work is always gonna be there but you won't if you burn yourself out.

Mini can't go without me, due to spacial constraints in our bond.

And ah would be more than a wee bit happy ta make ya feel some pain if ya go this route

[Okay, Mini apparently had strong opinions. As for the rest... Reeve shakes his head, even with those hands on it.]

My value, Richie, is in my use to other people. I can't solve problems here. I can't build useful machines. I can make sure the roads are safe and the buildings don't collapse. Or that those that will are handled safely. This is what I can do. This is how I can help. I need to help. I don't...

I owe the universe as a whole, Richie. I've done so much damage in my life.

No. No!

[ His thumbs brush over Reeve's cheekbones before resting on his shoulders. ]

That is not your value. That is not your value to me. Do you hear me?

[ His eyes burn behind his glasses. ] You've done bad shit in your life. So have I. So have a lot of people who came here.That's not what defines you. That's not what defines any of us. You don't owe us your body and life because you hurt people. You are more than what you've done. You are so much more than that. And I don't need you to do a fucking thing in order to care about you.

I didn't do bad things, Richie. I nearly contributed to the death of my entire world. It wasn't a small thing. There is so much balance to make up for. I bled out the soul of my planet. So yes, I do have to work hard to deserve what I have when so much of my life took from others, took from the planet. I have to make up for who I was and what I did.

[Even being the most moral man in Shinra didn't make him less of a man with the planet's blood on his hands. He did horrible things.]

And you I know you'll be my friend whether I do this or not. But I'm not doing it to have your friendship. I'm doing it to be able to live with myself.

It will never be enough.

[ It's a harsh truth he had to face himself, but it's the truth all the same. ]

The universe isn't going to forgive you. There is nothing to balance because the person you're trying to prove yourself to is the one person who will never let you off the hook.

[ He pokes Reeve between the eyes. ]

Working harder isn't going to fix this, Reeve.

[Richie isn't wrong. And Reeve knows it. But that doesn't make it easier.]

I need to be able to wake up in the morning and not loathe myself, Richie. To feel like there is meaning to the fact that I am here. That I am a net positive on someone's life for a change.

Are you kidding? You're a fucking gross positive to me!

[Richie can't believe this is a conversation they're having.]

You know why I like having you in my room? Because it's the first time since Eddie left that I wake up warm and next to someone I care about. The first time I've been the person taking care of someone instead of being taken care of. I come back to my room and there's something to look forward to. Something there other than memories and silence.

[One hand goes back to his cheek to make sure Reeve looks at him.]

You make me laugh and make me want to punch a tree. And the sex is great but even if we stopped that, I would still want you around me all the time because you make my life better. You just being you.

Big fucking net positive.

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