No Matter The Universe The Job Sucks

[work_wife]

WHO: Robin Buckley, You
WHERE: Spacedock NG-102
WHAT: Two dead end jobs and
WHEN: Throughout March
WARNINGS: None

I. Fast Food Blitz

Some lives are meant for customer service misery. Apparently Robin Buckley's is one of these lives. Here she is in her horrid purple and lime green striped uniform, with the headband with almost koala like ears and strange springy antennae, standing behind the counter of what could only be dubbed a fast food restaurant. And of course here she is, forced to face someone she actually knows. Literally it's a space station larger than a city or something. She had to take not one but two of those transport things to get here. How did anyone find her?

"Welcome to," she tries her best to produce a strange series of sounds that approximates the name of the place the best she can. She was told her accent was awful of course, but at least she'd been loaned a translator by her work so she could take orders. Doesn't mean she's good at saying stuff. "What can we get for you?"

Then she leans in, her eyes narrowed.

"And if you say one bad thing about me in this costume, I'm going to find you and ruin you."

OF course she is. She doesn't look good in these layered, heavily stripped ruffles. And the bows around her wrists are just silly looking.

II. Mascot Misery

Apparently threatening customers, even if they were her shipmates and might never let her live down the look, was a whole thing worth firing someone over. Or maybe just not rehiring them over. Go figure. Which had of course led to job number two.

And thus here Robin was, standing outside of a place with loud noises, bright colors, and so many screaming children of many different species beyond the door. Robin herself stands there in a clinging blue body suit, looking at her communication device, frowning at it. Her break was almost over and she'd have to go back on shift soon. Which would mean going inside, getting on the layers of the silver and gold costume that would make her look like a giant blue cross between a rat and a crab clad in a silver-gold bumblebee-like costume. It was a whole ass thing.

"What if I just quit my job. Like. I almost think working with Keith was better."

III. Space Record Shop? It's More Likely Than You Think

Listen, you can only put so much time of your life into saving aliens who don't know how to repair their own ship or stock spare parts, right? Sometimes you need to take the trade vouchers you've got from working for something personal to make the suffering of customer service worthwhile. And when Robin had started to walk past this place, of course she'd stopped.

How the fuck was there a Camelot Records here?

She turns into the place and yeah, it feels like she's back in the one in Starcourt. Sure there is a lot of signage not in languages she can even begin to recognize as such, but the place is rather large. And dammit, there's even a section of things she recognizes.

"No way!"

She pauses in her flipping to stare at one item in particular.

"This isn't supposed to be out for a few months!"

If you're from spring 1986 like Robin is at least.

IV. Wildcard
[Got an idea? Reach out to me by direct message, on discord, or on plurk to talk about it. Or go wild and just throw something at me of your own creation. Robin's so flexible she'll be good for anything.]

Comments

1.

[crystalmaster]

[Radley quirks an eyebrow.]

Oh, now, why would I say anything bad? It's really quite cute.

[Honestly, it looks like some little kid's wild, random design come to life, at least in Radley's way of thinking. He wouldn't be caught dead in it, but he feels like it does have a certain charm. That, and Robin isn't someone he'd have fun antagonizing.]

Is there any Earth food here?

[work_wife]

[No. This is not cute. Robin looks frustrated.]

You know, you could come work here if you think it's cute.

[Because she does not. Ruffles are not her.]

Not really. There are earth restaurants, but they weren't hiring.

[crystalmaster]

I could, but I already have a gig.

[He nods. That figures.]

Well, what do you recommend?

[work_wife]

[Yeah, everyone's going to applaud the outfit until it's on them to wear it. She's onto you, Radley.]

Um... Well, I've found the [and here she makes an oddly slurring noise] to be pretty close to fried kalamari so it's pretty good.

[crystalmaster]

[Radley actually does have a job, so not a lie. But yeah, he has to admit he wouldn't want to wear the costume himself.]

Uh ... okay. Cool. I'll try that. Do all the offerings have names like that?

[He could imagine it if that's the type of language those running it use.]

1

[daddy_longlegs]

Peter only really knows the girl in passing, but it's not too hard to pick out a human here. His lips quirk at the threat, and he shakes his head not so reassuringly as he holds out his tablet so he can take of selfie of himself and May Day with the cashier.

"I would never," he assures, "You got any kids meals at this place?"

[work_wife]

No. No he did not just do that. Robin looks so far from amused that it's actually pretty impressive. Why would you do this to her, strange dude with a baby on your chest?

"Yeah, never," she grumbles. "And yes. There are offspring meals. That's what they call them."

[daddy_longlegs]

Peter just grins, a cheeky look on his face as he pockets his device again. What? He's totally innocent. Are you really going to call him out in front of his baby??

"Offspring meals. Yeah, I guess. And uh- what do you get with those? Like a toy or something?"

[work_wife]

Yes, she's calling you out in front of the baby.

"You better delete that if you want an in with the best babysitter on Agra-10."

Meaning Steve Harrington. He would forgive her for the bribe, surely.

"Uh, yeah, toys. Well, they'd also be a dessert, I guess, if you were from a species that could metabolize inorganic items. Which some of our customers are. Do you want vegetarian, vegan, meat, or other?"

[daddy_longlegs]

"Would that be you?" Peter asks, but he does give a considering hum, looking down at May. He does need a reliable babysitter.

May's head cocks to the side as if she understands Robin's quip, and she sticks out her tongue, shaking her head, possibly to indicate that she cannot in fact metabolize inorganic items.

"Hold up- other?? What's other???"

II

[faceguy]

Lucky for Robin, the person approaching doesn't know she's from their ships - at least, not yet. Leo is a little surprised to see a human looking person, only because that seems to be the minority here. It reminds him of the hidden city, which is full of Yokai and no humans, so he doesn't stick out there. He doesn't stick out here, either.

Robin does, if only because what she's wearing is... hoo boy!

Though it's not really her Leo is interested in - he's more interested in the shouting coming from inside. Kids yelling, a girl in a mascot costume... Could this be... a cosmic Albearto's Pizza?

(Leo doesn't know what a Chuck E Cheese is.)

"Hey," says Leo casually, waving Robin down. "Do you mind telling me what this place is?"

He gestures past her at the door.

[work_wife]

Unluckily for Leo, Robin has encountered Donnie. So maybe this one is just a similar alien, but maybe... maybe she can recognize him for what he is. With enough time.

"Some form of space Chuck E Cheese," Robin says with a shrug. "That's what we call it back home. Combination food, games, and children running around screaming. It's universal. It's out of this world."

The last part is said with such annoyance in her tone that it might well be a slogan.

[faceguy]

Oh, even more strange, she speaks his language! Leo has the Comms data point right now, but that was more fluid than anything he’s heard out of other aliens.

Interesting!

But even more interesting is this establishment. Sure, okay, maybe at 15, he’s “too old” for a place like this. And admittedly it’s not like he wants to jump in the ball pit or whatever.

What he wants to know is…

“Do they have pizza?”

All Albearto’s have pizza! Well, except all the weird ones that failed on launch.

[work_wife]

Really, that question is what actually makes Robin get it, get just who he is. She tilts her head as she considers Leonardo.

"Are you related in some way to Donatello?"

Because that kid had wanted pizza pretty bad.

[faceguy]

That gets his eyes to light up. There’s no way she can be confusing his Donnie with another turtle Donatello - or the human one, for that matter. Someone from the ship, then?

“What gave it away?” He grins wide and strikes a pose. “Family resemblance? But I’m way better looking than him, right? It’s fine, you can say it!”

III

[fatedsacrifice]

Noct was hungry. There didnt seem to be many laces to really sit down and just forget about whatever new thing he and everyone else had been tossed into. But it wasn't just plain meat or fish or..well there was no way in hell he'd ever eat that paste.

Grass and fish would work just fine in a pinch.

With a sigh, he lifted a hand and ran it through his dark hair. Every place seemed almost weirder than the last. But nothing could've stopped him from the sight that he saw when he glanced at Robin.

"Quitting your job isn't a bad thing."

[work_wife]

"Damn, that's almost a ringing endorsement," Robin sighs as she looks at the guy. "Got any potions that cures horrible costumes? Or at least how demeaning this feels to be wearing?"

And that didn't seem likely. He was magic, he wasn't a miracle worker.

[fatedsacrifice]

Noctis laughed with the questions. "Sorry, they don't work like that, though sometimes I wish they did with the trouble we found ourselves in."

Dark blue eyes blinked. "Don't suppose you can get rid of that thing though and just say you need to show some poor lost stranger around?"

He could always warp them around, but that might be kidnapping even if she wanted to get the hell out of there.

[work_wife]

"I might get fired," she says with a sigh. But yeah, she's supposed to be making money. "Trying to get funds to help my friends, you know?"

ANd that doesn't seem very likely to happen if she can keep no jobs.

[fatedsacrifice]

That had him do a think for a minute. So he nodded in understanding and sympathy. Making gil or munny or whatever passed for currency here was important. And for other people, that was admirable.

"Hey I get it. So what can I do to help?"

I

[sunglassesincluded]

"I would like to see you try." Robin's customer replies dryly, arms folded while he watches her through his dark glasses. Unlike her, Wesker is dressed sharply, having made some modifications to his old S.T.A.R.S. uniform to properly look the part of ship security. Little things that have just the intended effect of being recognized as a person of authority.

He uncrosses his arms and places one hand on his hip instead, leaving his other hand free to vaguely gesture at the teenager and her surroundings. "I am checking on the members of the crew. But I will admit that I didn't expect anyone to chose this to spend their time with."

[work_wife]

Yeah, what could he even do? (Forgive her, she doesn't realize he's that Wesker yet.) But damn, the guy is so giving off cop vibes. No. Fed vibes. Like cops but slightly more menacing and competent.

"It's not that I chose this, sir," she says, because might as well play with their stupid station rules. "This just tends to be the kind of job I find."

[sunglassesincluded]

Wesker scoffs slightly for a split moment. "Excuses. It may be the only job you're familiar with, but the rest is either laziness or fear of trying something more rewarding than this." He hasn't found it difficult to make a couple meaningful connections and get certain individuals interested in what business he has to offer.

"Tell me." He prompts. "What do you aim to purchase with the salary tis place pays you?"

[work_wife]

Really? Robin doesn't look impressed by his comment. Why are adults so condescending all the time?

"I don't have to tell you anything, officer," she says, because if he's going to act like a condescending cop, she'll treat him like one. "Maybe you should order and stop holding up my line so I don't get fired?"

[sunglassesincluded]

"I would be doing you a favor if I got you fired from this place." Wesker retorts but casts a glance up at what is considered this place's menu.

"So. What is all this?" Yes, Robin. Please explain him what all of these dishes even are. He's more used to real food.