revivalproject | [Open] Worried Mama Lark

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[Open] Worried Mama Lark

WHO: Lark, Any of her CR that experienced Calibrations
WHERE: Wherever her people can be found
WHAT: Mom's hovering in worry guys
WHEN: June 11th-18th
WARNINGS: There may be motherly behaviors and lectures

A month. More or less a month (definitely less in some cases), where the people she cared about had been out of touch. Again. And when Lark had come back, she'd started to hear horrid things of people having been trapped. It was horrid.

Which is why people were going to have to deal with this now. Without announcement even. There's Lark, showing up at the door. In one hand a light scarf. In the other, a covered container with wafting hints of savory scent.

And the look on her face? It says she's not going to walk away easily. That and the dog that has gone to lay down across the doorway, tail thumping excitedly.

"How are you doing?"

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So many crafts, Tony. If it's not about threadcraft, she's limited.

"It is not your responsibility. It's the Agrii's. And I've heard there are those who have been here longer, so if it's anyone's responsibility, it is theirs."

So there's that. Ha! Countered.

"Don't take all of the blame. Leave some for the rest of us."

Tony did not looked convinced, quite unable to let go of blame in any capacity, but he sucked his teeth and at least stopped glaring at Lark like she was telling him he had magical powers again. It was probably all of their responsibility, to be more connected and watchful for problems like Beck. Tony still felt like a weak link.

"Is this part of your job?" he asked, first down at the scarf in his hand, then looking to Lark like he expected her to not be entirely truthful. "In the...monastery or whatever..." She had definitely corrected him several times about the exact nature of her commitment, and he tried to get his question out quickly before she had to correct him again, "Absolving people of their sins?"

"No one absolves someone of their sins but those they wrong and their own hearts. But I have been known to guide the listless. Usually that skill is turned to children though."

Her tone is light and teasing there.

Lark had to be a little wrong about that, because Tony was feeling somewhat absolved, and he knew that had nothing to do with his own heart. He breathed a laugh with a wry smile for her teasing, only to consider it more seriously to ask, "What if more kids show up?" That had to be their most egregious failing, that Omega could have wandered as far as Sh'Ka before Tony even knew she was on the planet, and their average age seemed to be skewing younger every day. "That's your whole...These kids are abandoned in the middle of town, totally alien planet. What do you do about the next one, and what do we do when it's ten of them and--now they've been here for years?" Even Billy and Tommy should have still been in school by now.

Well, there's a question. Had she a cup of tea she would lift it to take a sip to have more time to think.

"It is not my 'whole'. But I don't mind providing assistance, whether they were mages or not. But we'll figure something out Tony. Some problems can be planned for. Others must not be overthought."

As frequently as Tony's decision making came down to wildly destructive impulses, the suggestion that he couldn't exhaustively overthink every possible problem and outcome was fundamentally at odds with his design, and he raised a lip like Lark had just suggested they teach all of the children magic. "I'm not sure you can overthink kids," he countered. The more thinking the better, surely. "They're the future."

"Which of us has raised children, Tony?" she asks, smiling at him. They may be the future, but mostly if you thought too far ahead, you were pushing them into small boxes.

And each child was different.

That was a quite impossible point to argue, leaving Tony surrendering with a grim smirk and nod down at the scarf in his lap, where he restlessly set to tugging every row straight over his thigh. It was clearly for the best. "You know, my other self, out there in the universe, he has a kid, he figured it out," he said. "Steve told me, before, when he..." was a little more awkward to explain, and Tony tried to illustrate with a hand up flat to indicate a taller Steve; the one that at least recognized him. He didn't know if Lark had even met either of them, the illustration might have been pointless, so Tony waved it off with the same hand to continue, "I wonder what they're like, every day. I wonder what they're doing. They must be gorgeous, of course." With a flare, he invited Lark to admire his excellent genes, then dropped his hand to lean on stiffly. "I don't even have them and I'm overthinking it," he concluded, back to contemplating the scarf, and the way York shrank away at the sight of him.

"Yes, but this is you of another universe, isn't it? Does that mean there isn't a difference in his life in some way? I am not sure, but if that is true, and it seems so given he has a daughter, in some ways he is a different person, yes?"

How can he see that he's not better or worse, just different.

"That said, with how intently you care, with the right partner you'd make a lovely parent. Just as Rosethorn has been at my side and served as one."

The other guy must have been a very different person, as far as Tony could tell; he was less sure if Lark was trying to reassure him that this other Tony probably wasn't screwing the kid up, or just that he was unlikely to be in the position himself to screw up. He supposed both options were kind of effective, in their own way.

"The right partner, that's something, that really does help. Is there an amount of money that I could offer that it stops being gauche, to put someone in that position? Is that just a nanny? Maybe. Never mind," he mused, grimacing at this whole new facet of child-rearing strategy that he had inherited from his dad that he hadn't even considered yet; leaving the kid with the staff. "Tell you what, you tell me what you're looking for in a partner, and I'll promise not to...tell you when I'm overthinking, and maybe some of these kids showing up won't be entirely damaged by the experience."

Was it truly a different person, or just possession of a partner who gave him more faith in him. A partner who loves you and believes in you and gives you strength can do a lot. Not to say Jon couldn't. But Jon likely gave him strength in other ways.

"There's no money offered for love, Tony. It is given freely. But yes, some nobility hire assistants for caring for their children. I find it more fitting when they know they need extra help, not so they can escape the responsibilities of parenthood."

Still, what she's looking for in a partner? Lark has to consider that.

"And if I have already found an ideal partner and thus am not looking?"

While it was news to Tony that they were talking about love, it came as a mild surprise to him that he did already know that it was free so he was briefly distracted into not making it an argument. This was a recent development, that he has assimilated without realizing it, when Jon complained about the gifts Tony tried to give him, and when he and Cayde had shown up to pull him out of his grave, and when Lark told him to wash his hands so he could have soup, and Tony hadn't so much as offered any of them a weekly stipend.

He had to blink back into focus with some surprise, startled into asking, "You've been seeing someone and haven't even told me?"

Yes, she supposed that it was more common to talk to Tony about having to love himself rather than the love others have, but it's still something. Still, if she keeps at it, perhaps she will help others get through to Tony.

"No, I have not. Not here. But even if she is not here, I shall always love Rosethorn. My heart will always be hers."

Was that so wrong?

"Oh--" They weren't quite on the same wavelength again, and Tony had to wave his hand to try to tune to the correct one, "No--I mean, sure, that's--good for you, sweetheart, really, but right now she's not here, and I was wondering about what it took to take care of the kids that are here, now, without her." That seemed a bit like rubbing it in by the time he was done, and he was really starting to question what it meant that they were separated by a universe and Lark was so sure of that bond, but still took the commitment so seriously. "Should I be mad at Jon?" was out before he had fully considered how much the question betrayed.

"There aren't many here I feel would require the looking after who are not being so already. But forms of education, seeing them clothed, and a safe place for them to rest while someone can check in on them and ensure they are properly caring for themselves and learning basic skills would be important," she said, thoughtful as she uncovered the soup to offer to him.

Mad at Jon? She considers that with a frown.

"Has he done you wrong?"

Beck had been the one 'looking after' Peter, so Tony had to grimace, not sure he agreed that all of the kids had reliable care. And Omega kept turning up on her own where she probably really should not have been, not necessarily because Echo was unqualified (it wasn't like Tony could call himself qualified, either, to be fair), but perhaps because of a distinct incompatibility of needs. And because Echo was also, objectively, a child, and ultimately it really wasn't just the actual, under-5-foot children that Tony was worried about.

"Somewhere to check in. It would need an incentive, not like school attendance. Somewhere even someone like Tommy wouldn't feel like he had to make some kind of stand against it," Tony added, mostly toward the soup. Having these structures would inevitably mean some pushback. He wouldn't have willingly signed in somewhere every day when he first showed up. That could have been a major factor in why he found this whole process so difficult; his primary test case was the most difficult personality.

"No--I mean, maybe," he flapped his hand again, not sure what exactly he was supposed to be concerned about, or what boundaries were reasonable. Even on Earth, when a multiversal separation wasn't part of the equation, his girlfriends seeing other people hadn't been something Tony had figured out how to deal with, except to ignore it and maybe apologize. "We're--together, now, here," he said, finding some solace in the established phrasing when he was pretty sure he hadn't really said that out loud to anyone, even if it had never seemed to matter and everyone knew anyway. "And we were before he had gone away, back to Earth, like some people do, they go back and then they come back here again and it's, I haven't really figured out why that happens to some people, or if its just a timeline thing and it hasn't happened yet to others or they're here but 400 years ago..." Okay, he was filling the space of acknowledging the relationship a little densely now. "So, but, before he left, that time, his thing was, we only do this together, and I don't see other people, and I agreed, and that was fine. And then he came back, and there was someone else, in the meantime, and I--I don't know. He says he remembered, maybe not everything, but enough to make a really big decision, so it's not like..." Working through this out loud would be a lot less embarrassing alone.

One cannot always foresee the dangers some people present, which is a great sorrow. Still, she is rather intrigued by the way the man is thinking. She, of course, wouldn't see 'Tommy' as a child in the same way. In her world, he'd have been a full adult for many years.

Still, she considers his comment, and thinks about it.

"Had he any reason to believe he would ever return here? Because, well..."

Lark took a deep breath because it mattered.

"Rosethorn didn't want me to live in sorrow for having lost her. That she was brought back to me was impossible. But if you knew he would never see you again, would you not want him to find happiness?"

What Jon ever knew or didn't know at once was a difficult question to answer. It seemed to be everything, but only if he looked, so Tony opened his mouth only to close it again with a shrug of surrender at the infinite possible solution.

"I didn't really think of it like that, before now. It wasn't something I blamed him for," he said, with a tip of his head because 'blame' didn't seem like quite the phrase he was looking for, and he struggled over it for a moment with his hand twisting in the air before tossing the problem away to carry on. "I wouldn't blame him for anything he did to be happy, and it's inevitable, you know, he's going to find someone else, so it's not like I should be wasting the time I have now..." That was getting off track again. "You've, listen, really figured it out, made a science of it, you've got your gal and you're so sure of it that you don't even need a ring to keep her on the other side of the universe. I've been trying for a really long time to figure that out, and it's like I've been doing everything backwards, I do the ring and I'm putting this armour up between what he's doing over there and here..."

"Perhaps here he hasn't found someone else and doesn't want to. Assuming he would robs him of his agency. What's more, it makes you sabotage yourself. If you love him, make that clear. Bind yourself to him however seems right to you both."

Still, she looks a little confused.

"A ring for me and Rosethorn? I would think not. Women cannot marry each other."

Tony's face screwed up with an obvious frustration that he had to release with a sigh into his bowl that he brought up close to his face, as though it wasn't hot enough in here already. Lark and Jon probably agreed on what she was trying to tell Tony, he'd already said his own version of 'however seems right', so she was probably right, but that didn't make it any easier for Tony to determine how much he was supposed to...care about anything. He couldn't seem to find any middle ground between not enough, and far too much, and Jon did find someone else but it wasn't here, and Lark was here and wouldn't find someone else.

Maybe she could just tell better than Tony could what was right for any of them. At least, that was how she had made the marriage thing sound the last time they talked about it. "I thought you said you didn't want to, not that you couldn't," he replied, feeling misled since that distinction had already made him doubt that ring he had been carrying around. "That you didn't need it because you loved each other enough and already raised all these kids together and it was stupid or whatever."

"We don't need it. But we also cannot. And we do love each other enough and have raised children. I think, were we not Circle dedicates it would hurt more, to know we could not have that. But the Circle accepts the two of us as we are," she points out.

So they are safe. And she is happy with the life they've had.

"But what works for me doesn't mean that it shouldn't be true for you."

It was a nice sentiment. It was just that, so far, Tony at spectacularly failed at what he thought was supposed to work enough times that he knew something had to change, and he was pretty sure he didn't know anyone else nearly as confident in their relationship as Lark. Maybe it just seemed that way, without Rosethorn actually here for more perspective.

He nodded slowly, still looking discouraged, but not quite as tortured as he had started. Even if he still didn't feel like he knew any better how to stop being so destructive, there were friends here that didn't yet hold that against him. "That's it, huh? Having a place that accepts you," he said, considering his soup thoughtfully. "That's probably where to start with the kids, too."

Perhaps Lark was just lucky to be so confident. Or perhaps the confidence went hand in hand in her need to have that point of faith when so much is uncertain.

"Isn't that something everyone wants? Somewhere to accept them? Someone? ANd yes, it's a good starting point with children. That's what Rosethorn and I use Discipline Cottage for."

The idyllic pastoral image that Tony had developed of Lark's life back home was very abruptly shattered by this title, which did not sound like the kind of place known for assuring children that they were accepted. Any other day, the coy quirk of his brow and tug of his smirk might have been more pronounced as he echoed, "Discipline Cottage?," so he was going to have to remember this to tease Lark with later, when trying to flirt with her about spanking wouldn't sound as pathetic. "Every time I think I have a handle on you, you keep me on my toes. I'm going to have the lay down after this. Maybe that's just the soup. Did you do that on purpose? What did you put in this?"

Yes, people tended to think it meant more than it was.

"Self-discipline is important to learning magic, Tony," she points out. That's where the name comes from after all. "And there are a variety of tubers and mushrooms in there."

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[Open] Worried Mama Lark

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