Everything on the table is memories she doesn't really want anyone else to see. Wanda doesn't know why she's telling Tommy to go look - self-sabotage isn't usually her thing, but now there's no one else left who knows what happened. They see her, and they may love her, but they don't know that her failures only come in calamities. Despite her best efforts, everything always falls apart. This is how it started:
She's in the ruins of the cathedral, defending the key from a seemingly endless onslaught of Ultron sentries. It doesn't bother her. This is trivial. She could do this all day and only tire from standing.
Until pain (not hers, but Pietro's) rips through her senses and Wanda staggers as if she had just been shot. No, not him, she can't lose him, she can't, he was supposed to be safe–
He's dying.
And no matter how frantically Wanda tries to reach out for him, she can feel him slipping farther and farther away...and then there's nothing but the agonizing void where his presence had always been, even before the Mind Stone remade her. Pain and fear and grief overwhelm her, and as she falls to her knees screaming the world goes red.
Ultron sentries burn out of existence before its fury. In the moment, this doesn't terrify her. She has no room for anything but her grief.
Ultron did this.
Ultron did this and she'd helped him.
This is all her fault.
Ultron is still out there.
Time has no meaning anymore, and Wanda's utterly unaware of how long she'd been crying on the ground. A hollow rage is beginning to take over: this is Ultron's fault, and so Wanda is going to hunt him down and kill him in the worst way she can imagine.
She moves through the ruins of Novi Grad in a blur, sentries falling with Wanda barely making the conscious decision to unleash her power on them. Scarlet wreathes her hands, again without Wanda willing it, and some part of her mind must be aware that she's lost control but the rest of her is reveling in it. She wants to make him hurt the way he'd hurt Pietro, the way he'd hurt her people. Nothing else matters.
And when she finds him, when she finally does tear his heart from his chest – she feels nothing but dark satisfaction (she could have made it cleaner but she wanted this to hurt). Wanda squeezes the 'heart' a little harder and scarlet power consumes it completely. There's nothing left.
And as the city suddenly begins to plummet to the ground, she realizes that soon there will be nothing left of her too and that's just fine.
When the memory fades, Wanda hasn't moved from the bed. She's curled in on herself a bit, still ashamed. She had done all of this for the people of Sokovia, and who had she hurt the most? They'll never know how many people died because she couldn't control her temper long enough for everyone to evacuate.
"Do you see?" Her voice is quiet, barely there. "It's enough to get us in trouble, but I couldn't save any of them. And as long as the Agrii stay away from us...I don't know what to do."
And still...all that power and it doesn't hold a candle compared to his Wanda's. Would she have messed up so badly? Or would she have managed to save everyone? Or just stop it before it even got to that point?
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She's in the ruins of the cathedral, defending the key from a seemingly endless onslaught of Ultron sentries. It doesn't bother her. This is trivial. She could do this all day and only tire from standing.
Until pain (not hers, but Pietro's) rips through her senses and Wanda staggers as if she had just been shot. No, not him, she can't lose him, she can't, he was supposed to be safe–
He's dying.
And no matter how frantically Wanda tries to reach out for him, she can feel him slipping farther and farther away...and then there's nothing but the agonizing void where his presence had always been, even before the Mind Stone remade her. Pain and fear and grief overwhelm her, and as she falls to her knees screaming the world goes red.
Ultron sentries burn out of existence before its fury. In the moment, this doesn't terrify her. She has no room for anything but her grief.
Ultron did this.
Ultron did this and she'd helped him.
This is all her fault.
Ultron is still out there.
Time has no meaning anymore, and Wanda's utterly unaware of how long she'd been crying on the ground. A hollow rage is beginning to take over: this is Ultron's fault, and so Wanda is going to hunt him down and kill him in the worst way she can imagine.
She moves through the ruins of Novi Grad in a blur, sentries falling with Wanda barely making the conscious decision to unleash her power on them. Scarlet wreathes her hands, again without Wanda willing it, and some part of her mind must be aware that she's lost control but the rest of her is reveling in it. She wants to make him hurt the way he'd hurt Pietro, the way he'd hurt her people. Nothing else matters.
And when she finds him, when she finally does tear his heart from his chest – she feels nothing but dark satisfaction (she could have made it cleaner but she wanted this to hurt). Wanda squeezes the 'heart' a little harder and scarlet power consumes it completely. There's nothing left.
And as the city suddenly begins to plummet to the ground, she realizes that soon there will be nothing left of her too and that's just fine.
When the memory fades, Wanda hasn't moved from the bed. She's curled in on herself a bit, still ashamed. She had done all of this for the people of Sokovia, and who had she hurt the most? They'll never know how many people died because she couldn't control her temper long enough for everyone to evacuate.
"Do you see?" Her voice is quiet, barely there. "It's enough to get us in trouble, but I couldn't save any of them. And as long as the Agrii stay away from us...I don't know what to do."
And still...all that power and it doesn't hold a candle compared to his Wanda's. Would she have messed up so badly? Or would she have managed to save everyone? Or just stop it before it even got to that point?